2010 fantasy football -- preseason predictions

All the draft picks are in, so it’s time for my fearless predictions:

Heidi’s team (Heidi)
Prediction -- 12th place, 1705 pts
Breakdown: Heidi’s team actually looks half-decent, but we’ll be rooting against her all year. Starting QB: Tony Romo. Starting WR: Dez Bryant. Backup RB: Felix Jones. She’s the Dallas Defense away from being Jerry Jones. So, best of luck to everyone this year, except for Heidi. Hope you only score 20 points all year. Nothing personal.

Farve Dollar Footlongs (Ant)
Prediction -- 11th place, 1800 pts
Breakdown: Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the homer team of the year! QB Kevin Kolb, WR DeSean Jackson and TE Brent Celek all have a home with Anthony’s team, as does former FB and current Falcons DE Dan Klecko. Expect Anthony to cut QB Eli Manning to pick up WR Fred Barnett or Phillies SS Jimmy Rollins in the coming days.

The Tebow Connection (Joel)
Prediction -- 10th place, 1825 pts
Breakdown: I want to put Joel’s team higher – QB Joe Flacco, RB Ray Rice and TE Vernon Davis look like a great trio of power. But if Joel’s team does well it’ll mean I’ll have to talk about the rest of his team in the weekly recaps: WR Devin Aromashodu, RB Javid Best, WR Steve Breaston. I don’t need ridiculous names here, kids. I write all my own jokes.

Springfield Atoms (Bob)
Prediction -- 9th place, 1850 pts
Breakdown: Bob drafted both the Eagles Defense and Terrell Owens. I feel like there’s a cathartic reality show involved there, but I just can’t put my finger on it. He also got QB Aaron Rodgers (who’ll end up as the top points scorer overall this year) and WRs Charles Johnson and the other Steve Smith, but I just can’t rank a T.O. team any higher than this.

Obama’s Kenyan Birth (Jim)
Prediction -- 8th place, 1889 pts
Breakdown: Jim drafted two Fs (Finley, Jermichael and Forsett, Justin), three Cs (Carson Palmer, CJ Spiller and Colson, Marques) but only one A (Austin, Miles). Where I’m from, that’s not a good GPA. Also, I hate Miles Austin. And I decided Andre Johnson didn’t count because it messed up my joke.

Jonathan’s PopPop (Dad)
Prediction -- 7th place, 1949 pts
Breakdown: If this was 2006 Dad would be the clear favorite, because QB Jay Cutler, WR Randy Moss, RB Michael Turner, WR Steve Smith, and RB Thomas Jonees were all studs just a few years ago. But it’s not, and he won’t end up separating from the middle of the pack. On the plus side, his team isn’t weighed down by any Eagles, so it shouldn’t be a miserable season in the end.

Stay Puft Haynesworth (NewMike)
Prediction -- 6th place, 1950 pts
Breakdown: Our reigning champ’s draft result relies too much on last year’s Super Bowl losers, with QB Peyton Manning and WR Pierre Garcon leading his team. WR Wes Welker and TE Antonio Gates are fine players, but his RBs are just terrible. Plus, he managed to draft Asante Samuel, meaning even if he gets close to the top spot in the standings he won’t be able to grab it and wrestle it to the ground.

I’m on a Horse (ChampMike)
Prediction -- 5th place, 2001 pts
Breakdown: I can’t in good conscience put a team coached by Mike any lower than this, but after RB Chris Johnson, QB Phillip Rivers and RB Cedric Benson there’s not much else here. Dwane Bowe, Derrick Mason and Roy Williams all at WR is the definition of the NFL’s all-mediocre team. And if we have an unseasonably warm September Mike could get off to a rough start, because his backup QB is all-pro heat exhaustion expert Donovan McNabb.

Blue Collar Killers (Jeff)
Prediction -- 4th place, 2020 pts
Breakdown: Listen to me closely: Don’t sleep on Jeff this year. Our league’s favorite doormat is a one-time Awesome Cup Champion, and his team looks great on paper right now. WRs Roddy White, Larry Fitzgerald, Chad Ochocinco and Donald Driver are all worth starters, and RB Adrian Peterson should lead the league in rushing this year. The only problem with his team? QB Brett Favre could retire at any time, leaving him rudderless.

West Coast Westy (Capt. Awesome)
Prediction -- 3rd place, 2072 pts
Breakdown: If you’re looking for RBs, here’s where they ended up. Stephen Jackson, Rashard Mendenhall, Brandon Jacobs, LeSean McCoy, and Jerome Harrison all fell to me (along with Comcast spokesman Tom Brady) while you people picked up competent wideouts. Fools. Andy Reid can tell you a reliable passing game never wins championships in the end.

I heart WRs (Paul)
Prediction -- 2nd place, 2125 pts
Breakdown: Paul was my preseason pick to win the league last year, and that pressure killed his almost from the get-go in 2009. So, because I’m a vengeful person, I’m picking him again to do well. QB Matt Schaub and RB Frank Gore are studs, and the rest of his RB corps is solid. But for someone who lives WRs so much, his crew seems weak: Mike Sims Walker, Malcolm Floyd and Devin Hester aren’t scaring anyone. Looks like he’ll have to win with his ground game for a change.

I Love Me Some Me (Joanner)
Prediction -- 1st place, 2126 pts
Breakdown: Jo doesn’t have that pesky pregnancy holding her back anymore, and she’s followed up her third-place finish last year with a solid all-around draft. QB Drew Brees, RB Ryan Grant and WR Anquan Boldin make up the best starting three in the league, and Jonathan Stewart and Matt Forte on the bench both should be fantasy surprises this year. On the negative side, she did draft Clinton Portis, which might be enough for her to forfeit right away just out of spite.

OK, kids – get those rosters ready for Thursday night, when the first game starts. Good luck to everyone (except Heidi).

More Eagles items on Ebay

I know you're getting ready for the football season, but do you have all the supplies you need? Here's a quick look at some of the essentials available on Ebay for Eagles fans right now:

Terrell Owens Jersey, Youth Medium ($7.99)
It's a steal for his return stint with the Eagles in 2011, when Mike Vick is the starting QB and Osama Bin Laden is signed at WR.

Philadelphia Eagles pumpkin carving kit ($5.99)
Includes six different patterns, but only five include the Eagles logo or name. But it's never too early to get ready for Halloween.

Five-foot tall fake Eagles mascot ($330.99)
I have no idea what team uses this mascot, but it's not the Eagles. Maybe it's the Palo Alto Pencil-Eraser Birds?

Game-worn Brian Westbrook trading card ($0.99)
I can only assume that Westbrook wore the card after one of his concussions, because nothing in that phrase makes any sense.

Philadelphia Eagles painted quarters ($14.99)
Set of three includes McNabb, Owens, Westbrook. From the seller: "If a die hard Eagles Fan can see none of these players play for them anymore great item good luck."

Four tickets to the Eagles/Vikings game ($3,515.60)
For the same price as a used car you could get up close with Minnesota QB Brett Favre ... provided he doesn't retire again between now and December.

Eagles wedding garter ($9.99)
Of course, if you throw this at your wedding, there's always the danger Asante Samuel will appear and tackle someone. I'm just kidding. Samuel never tackles anyone.

2010 Fantasy Football draft order

Get ready, kids. Everybody is signed up for the return of the "Who needs linebackers?" fantasy league, and of course you're all familiar with the draft rules. So, with everyone's proxy assembled at Fort Awesome, let's select the draft order for this season.

Good luck to all, and the first name being pulled from the Eagles' skull cap is ...

12 -- West Coast Westy (Capt. Awesome)
        Son of a ... really? I've got to rearrange these draft rules next year. In response to getting the worst pick possible, my proxy, a dancing Eagles hamster, remains silent and furry. Let no one say that this process is rigged.
        The next name out of the hat goes to...

11 -- Why Can't Us (Ant)
        Just a bit of bad luck for Anthony, who would have picked 8th in a traditional draft order. But the good news is that Ladanian Tomlinson will probably still be available here, since he always ends up drafting him. His proxy, a Donovan McNabb bobble head doll, vomits in response. In fairness, it's been pretty hot in this room.
        Next pick goes to...

10 -- StayPuft Haynesworth (New Mike)
        Our reigning champ gets a slightly higher pick than expected, but that might be bad news. He won the league picking 13th last year. We only have 12 teams this year, because per league policy our last place finisher was executed at season's end in January. Mike's representative, a fluffy white pillow, lays on the floor apathetic in response, much like Albert Hanyesworth.
        Moving on, the next name appearing is...

9 -- I Love Me Some Me (Joanner)
        At word of the news Joanna's proxy, Junior Awesome, promptly cries and fills his diaper. I remind him that his mother just picked out my name dead last. He reminds me that it's my turn to change his diaper by yelling louder.
        After a slight diaper delay, we're back to picking and the next slot goes to...

8 -- I Heart WRs (Paul)
        Paul's pick comes in ... exactly where he finished last year. How dull. Sort of like the Eagles' first-string preseason offense. Paul's proxy, a mini-level sitting on my desk, remains perfectly and uninterestingly balanced.
        Next name out of the hat belongs to...

7 -- Jonathan's PopPop (Dad)
        Bad news to everyone picking after #7 -- you no longer have any shot of picking up Kevin Kolb, who is already one of the top four QBs all-time according to my father (behind John Elway, Dan Marino and Koy Detmer, of course). Dad's representative, a green teddy bear signaling touchdown, signals touchdown in response. Apparently, he doesn't know that a TD is only worth 6 before the extra point.
        Our next selection goes to lucky player ...

6 -- Heidi's team (Heidi)
        Hoepfully that name is just a placeholder, but the pick is for sure now. Our only player to be banned a season for steroids will pick right in the middle of the pack. Heidi's proxy, a bottle of NyQuil, remains green and angry, vowing revenge on all who dare challenge it.
        Moving along quickly, the next name is ...

5 -- Springfield Atoms (Bobert)
        Tough break for Bob, who would have gotten the third pick in a most just system. Instead of getting Ray Rice he'll be forced to swallow another year of Frank Gore. Bob's proxy, an elderly gentleman on Pawn Stars trying to sell his 18th century rifle, is devastated by the news that his gun is actually a fake. The news of the #5 pick doesn't seems to affect him at all, however.
        Back in the hat, and the next slip pulled out belongs to...

4 -- Obama's Kenyan Birth (Jim)
        Jim finished uncharacteristically poorly last year, but even with a pick this high still probably won't pick an RB with his first pick. But despite that character flaw I appreciate that Jim each year tries to class up the joint with some political humor. His representative, a copy of the Constitution on our bookshelf, weeps at both the pick slot and the team name.
        Only three players left, and the next one out of the hat is ...

3 -- The Tebow Connection (Joel)
        Am I the only one who has been singing non-stop since Joel first posted his team name? "Why aren't there many more songs about Tebow/ And how he's such a swell guy? / Someday we'll find it / The Tebow Connection / The lovers, the Broncos, and meeeee." Joel's proxy, Elmo's First Book of Colors, smiles approvingly. Ironically, orange doesn't come up until the last page of the book.
        Two names left, and the first-runner up goes to ...

2 -- Blue Collar Killers (Jeff)
        The beautiful thing about presason is that every fan believes this could be the year their team wins it all ... even Jeff's team, which usually suffers a heroic string of bad luck and bad management to end up at the bottom each year. His proxy, one of my blue dress shirts, falls off a hanger and crumples in response to the pick.
        That leaves just one player left, so congrats to...

1 -- I'm on a Horse (Champ Mike)
        Our only two-time Awesome Cup champion scores another minor victory, moving up five spots in the draft order to grab the first overall pick. He doesn't need the extra help, but something tells me he's not going to complain about it either. His proxy, a stuffed panda, waits menicingly for the inveitable bloodbath to come.

That's it folks. Everybody get your draft order set, and I'll flip the switch on Sept. 1. That gives you all a week and a day to get your affairs in order. Remember that whoever drafts Tony Romo automatically gets the preseason last place ranking. Any other questions, you know where to find me.

Proposed Kolb grading system

Sure, you could just look at the Eagles record to decide how well new QB Kevin Kolb is playing. But what fun would that be? What we need here is a set of statistical criteria to judge every aspect of Kolb’s game against how the Maryland Racial Slurs’ new QB (Donovan McNabb) is doing, and then determine a clear and completely arbitrary winner. In fact, we should do that every single week, constantly evaluating and second-guessing Kolb’s entire career.

So, let’s see what we’ve got from the first set of preseason games:

---------------------------------------------
QB Rating: Point to McNabb
Kolb 83.5, McNabb 124.0

Completion percentage: Point to McNabb
Kolb 6/11, McNabb 5/8

Yards: Point to Kolb
Kolb 95, McNabb 58

TDs: Point to McNabb
Kolb 0, McNabb 1

Turnovers: Push
Kolb 0, McNabb 0

Rushing Yards: Point to Kolb
Kolb 15, McNabb 1

Team offensive points: Point to McNabb
Kolb 6, McNabb 7

Team win: Push
Kolb Yes, McNabb Yes

Result: McNabb 4, Kolb 2, Push 2.
Results for the year: McNabb leads 1-0 (preseason)
---------------------------------------------

Keep in mind that this is still the preseason, so I may tweak the formula before the regular season recaps begin.

Same as it ever was

A look at the Phillies, through 111 games:

Starting rotation
2009 – Lee, Happ, Martinez, Moyer, Hamels
2010 – Halladay, Oswalt, Blanton, Kendrick, Hamels

Infield
2009 – Howard, Utley, Rollins, Feliz
2010 – Sweeney, Valdez, Rollins, Polanco

Road record
2009 – 34 wins, 19 losses
2010 – 26 wins, 30 losses

Runs scored
2009 – 585
2010 – 524

All Stars
2009 – Five (Howard, Utley, Ibanez, Victorino, Werth)
2010 – Two (Howard, Halladay)

Record
2009 – 63-48
2010 – 62-49

So, one year later, we’ve had three controversial pitcher trades, a complete replacement of the bench, major injuries to half the team … and we’re back to the exact same spot. Yay?

Office turnover

Since K David Akers joined the Eagles 11 years ago, he’s had 246 different co-workers on the playing field alongside him (not including coaches and trainers). His oldest co-worker, QB Donovan McNabb, had been with him since 1999 but was traded from the team in the off-season.

Here’s a closer look at the cast of characters he’s toiled alongside since his start as an Eagles employee:

** 11 different QBs have taken snaps in games (or at least in practice) for the Eagles over that span. They are (in descending order of skill) Donovan McNabb, Jeff Garcia, A. J. Feeley, Koy Detmer, Michael Vick, Jeff Blake, Mike McMahon, Doug Pederson, Andy Hall, Tim Hasselbeck and Kevin Kolb.

** 22 different RBs have taken a hand-off since then, most notably Duce Staley and Brian Westbrook. But the list also includes luminaries like Amp Lee, Eric Bieniemy, Rod ‘He Hate Me’ Smart, Darnell Autry, and someone named Eric McCoo.

** The team has employed 33 different offensive linemen but 45 unique defensive linemen – unusual, since a typical defense features just four linemen and a typical offense five.

** The Eagles have employed three other kickers – Jose Cortez, Norm Johnson and Todd France – during Akers stay but needed seven other punters. They include Dirk Johnson, Sean Landeta and Sav Rocca, but also some guy named Reggie Hodges.

** 32 different linebackers have taken the field during the span. Only three were good: Jeremiah Trotter, Ike Reese and William Thomas. Among those who were not: Mike Labinjo, Pago Togafau, Torrance Daniels.

** Only two players of the 246 were listed before Akers in the Eagles' alphabetical roster over that time frame: LB Keith Adams and DE Victor Abiamiri.

** The team has gone through 28 different WRs over that span, but only three have posted a 1,000-yard season: Terrell Owens in 2004, Kevin Curtis in 2007 and DeSean Jackson in 2009. Surprisingly, that list does not include great wideouts like Dietrich Jells, Billy McMullen or Na Brown.

The Eagles invited 21 rookies to training camp this year and 8 other new veterans, so it looks like Akers will be making more new friends soon.

Excited about football

I'll be the first to admit it: I didn't think I'd be psyched about football this year, but as soon as this week rolled around I found myself desperate to see the boys back on the field again. Why? Consider the following:

1 -- This team is nothing but young talent. The squad has 16 key players under 30, and a handful more who just hit that magic number.

2 -- The Philly defense still has some major holes, but the offense already looks to be coming along just fine. That doesn't necessarily mean more wins, but it does make for some exciting shootouts.

3 -- The fan base has already been rabid, and there's no reason to think that they're going to calm down anytime soon.

4 -- The playoffs are a real possibility. When you look at the other teams in their division, none of them have a clear edge. Sure, it'll take some luck, but it's not an impossible climb up to a playoff slot.

I know a lot of folks are pessimistic looking ahead, but don't count me among them. Football is back for good this week, and it should be a time for excitement throughout Philadelphia.

It all starts on Saturday, when the MLS All-Star break wraps up and the Philadelphia Union retake the field to start the second half of the football season. Who would have thought their inaugural season could be this exciting?

Join or Die, baby. Join or Die.

Wait, you thought I was talking about these jerks? Hell no. Nothing about this NFL season looks like fun.

Thanks again, Eagles

Every day, on my way to work, I pass by this bus stop just a block from my office. Last Friday they changed the ad on the side of it:


So now I'll get to see that every day until September.

Thanks again, Eagles. This is gonna be a great football season. Excuse me for a moment while I wretch in the corner.

Fun with video

If you missed it, this was inspired by this much better post.

He's going the distance...

Just another FYI chart -- click on the image to make it bigger.

Trying to be relentlessly positive

Chase Utley could be out for several weeks with a thumb injury. The last time the Phillies lost their all-star 2B to an extended injury was 2007 ... when the Phillies staged a late-season rally to win their division.

The Phillies were 3.5 games out starting Tuesday. The last time they were that far out after June 1 was in June 2009 ... when the Phillies staged a late-season rally to win their division.

Jimmy Rollins has already missed 57 games this year. The last season he missed more than 30 games was 2008 ... when the Phillies staged a late-season rally to win their division.

The Phillies have already been shut out seven times this season. The last time they were shut out that many times in one year was 2009 ... when the Phillies staged a late-season rally to win their division.

Just saying ...

My annual pilgrimage

Yes, I was at this game. On a positive note, I got some fun pictures.

Your Philadelphia sports life

Click on the timeline to make it bigger.
Look, I know the Flyers loss was a little painful, but let's look at the positives: The chart above shows that we're in possibly the best pro sports stretch of our lives (well, at least since I've understood baseball.)

I don't want to be picky, but ...

The Flyers have had an amazing season; They're facing a do-or-die game six in the Stanley Cup Finals; They became the first #7 seed ever to host the conference championships; they became only the fourth professional sports franchise to come back from a 3-0 series deficit; and they did all this after qualifying for the playoffs after a shootout win on the very last day of the regular season.

So, ESPN ... ... do you think you could finally update the Flyers team page on your site to include a picture of Briere in a Flyers uniform? He hasn't worn the Buffalo black and gold since 2007.

Thanks. And let's go Flyers.

Perfection in Philly sports, 1964-present

June 21, 1964 -- Phillies pitcher Jim Bunning pitches a perfect game in New York against the Mets. The win, in which Bunning recorded 10 Ks, puts him at 7-2 for the season thus far.

Nov. 21, 1967 -- Flyers G Bernie Parent records his first career perfect game, a 3-0 shutout of the Montreal Candieans. Parent would record 50 total shutouts in his Flyers career.

Oct. 14, 1979 -- The Flyers defeat the Toronto Maple Leafs 4-3 in the first of 35-straight games without a loss, a record of perfection which still stands today.

May 1983 -- The Sixers sweep the Knicks in the first round of the NBA playoffs and the Lakers in the finals, but lose one game to the Bucks in their second round series and finish the postseason an imperfect 12-1.

Dec. 22, 1991 -- After completing a 24-22 win over the Washington Redskins, the Eagles defense (anchored by Reggie White and Jerome Brown) finishes the seas ranked #1 against the run, #1 against the pass, and #1 overall.

March 2, 2004 -- The St. Joe's Hawks defeat St. Bonaventure 82-50 to finish the regular season 27-0, the last Division I basketball program to post a perfect regular season.

Dec. 19, 2004 -- The Eagles finish the NFC East regular season with a 12-7 win over the Dallas Cowboys, completing a perfect 6-0 division schedule. They follow it up in 2005 with a 0-6 record.

Sept. 23, 2007 -- Eagles QB Donovan McNabb records a perfect QB rating, 158.3, in a 56-21 victory over the Lions. McNabb threw for 381 yards and four TDs.

May 29, 2010 -- Phillies pitcher Roy Halladay pitches a perfect game in Florida against the Marlins. The win, in which Halladay recorded 11 Ks, puts him at 7-3 for the season thus far.

Happy Birthday, G

He keeps getting older, but his birthday cards remain timeless.

Fun facts about the Flyers

Learn about your favorite team before they head off to the Stanley Cup Finals!

C Jeff Carter -- At 6-3 and 200 pounds, he is roughly the same size as Cole Hamels.

G Michael Leighton -- He has started in goal for 10 different teams in the last 10 years, including the Windsor Spitfires and Albany River Rats. Up until this year, he had a winning record with four of them.

D Oskars Bartulis -- He is a member of the Flyers roster.

LW Ville Leino -- His first name is Finnish, meaning "a strong willed, helmed man." He does, in fact, wear a helmet.

C Mike Richards -- He has a gold medal from when Sidney Crosby beat the US Hockey team in the Olympics, and yet we still love him.

LW Simon Gagne -- He is not dead.

LW Daniel Carcillo -- He collected over 200 penalty minutes this season, meaning he sat in the box for more than three whole games.

D Chris Pronger -- He is, in fact, a Canadian.

Tough choices

Since we’re faced with another bonanza of Philly sports tonight, here’s a handy guide to what you should be watching. Simply answer the easy questions below and total up your scoresheet to see which Philadelphia success story deserves air time on your nearest TV:

** Is it the NHL playoffs? (If yes, +1 Flyers)
** Is it the MLB playoffs? (Yes, +1 Phillies)
** Is Simon Gagne playing? (Yes, +1 Flyers)
** Is Simon Gagne hurt but playing? (Yes, +2 Flyers)
** Is Simon Gagne dead? (Yes, +1 Phillies)
** Is Roy Halladay pitching for the Phils? (Yes, +1 Phillies)
** Is Kyle Kendrick in goal for the Flyers? (Yes, +1 Phillies)
** Have the Phillies scored double-digits yet? (Yes, +1 Flyers)
** Have the Flyers chased the other goalie? (Yes, +1 Phillies)
** Are the Flyers down 3-0 in a game seven? (Yes, +2 Flyers)
** Are the Phillies lighting up Johan Santana? (Yes, +2 Phillies)
** Are the Flyers playing Pittsburgh? (Yes, +1 Flyers)
** Are the Phillies playing Pittsburgh? (Yes, +1 Flyers)
** Is Ryan Howard up to bat? (Yes, +1 Phillies)
** Are Chase Utley or Jimmy Rollins up to bat? (Yes, +1 Phillies)
** Is Ross Gload up to bat? (Yes, +1 Flyers)
** Are the Flyers on a power play? (Yes, +1 Flyers)
** Are the Phillies using binoculars? (Yes, +1 Phillies)
** Are you in attendance at the Phillies game? (Yes, +1 Flyers)
** Are you Charlie Manuel? (Yes, +1 Phillies)
** Are you Ed Snider? (Yes, +1 Flyers)
** Are you Andy Reid? (Yes, +1 passing plays)


Honestly, the real solution here is to get a dual-tuner DVR already…

Least essential Phils jerseys

Here's a quick look at actual Phillies jerseys up for sale on Ebay right now:

Ryan Madson 2008 World Series jersey (game used)
$7,999.99, plus $5 shipping
Sure, it's historic. But $8,000 could also get you season tickets for the next 30-plus years. Plus, this jersey tends to come apart at the seams in the ninth inning.

Kyle Drabek signed jersey
$119.99
Nothing shows off how much you love your team like wearing the shirt of the guy traded for somebody much better.

Francisco Rosario 2007 jersey (game used)
$195
I have no memory who this guy is. He was on the 07 playoff team? Are you sure?

President Obama XXL #44 jersey
$49.99
No. Just stop it. This could fit three or four Democratic presidents in it, and it's the worst kind of novelty jersey.

Phillies pet jersey
$4.99
Nevermind. That's the worst kind of novelty jersey.

Adam Eaton 2008 jersey (game-used)
$399
Somehow the Phils won a World Series this year despite shelling out $8 million for Eaton's four wins on the season. Maybe he wore this during one of them!

Eric Bruntlett 2007 St. Patrick’s day jersey (game used)
$149.99
The Phils don't play real games in March, and anything worn during a spring training game cannot be considered "game used."

Mitch Williams jersey
$39.99
No one should wear a choker jersey. Ever.

Jim Thome jersey
$48.62 plus $13.61 shipping
Why the weird price? The seller is up in Canada, and they still haven't received word that Thome left the team four years ago.

Greg Lewis jersey
$49.99
This actually shows up when you search "Phillies jerseys" on Ebay, proving once again that Greg Lewis ruins everything.

2010 MLB salary comparison chart

For you consideration...

$31.5 M -- Yankees P AJ Burnett and P Mariano Rivera
$34.7 M -- Phillies 1B Ryan Howard and P Roy Halladay
$34.9 M -- Pittsburgh Pirates (whole roster)
$37.7 M -- Cubs OF Alfonso Soriano and P Carlos Zambrano
$38.2 M -- San Diego Padres (whole roster)
$39.5 M -- Mets P Johan Santana and OF Carlos Beltran
$46.8 M -- Yankees P CC Sabathia and SS Derek Jeter
$48.5 M -- Arizona Diamondbacks (whole roster)
$50.8 M -- Oakland Athletics (whole roster)
$53.6 M -- Yankees 3B Alex Rodriguez and 1B Mark Teixeira
$55.1 M -- Texas Rangers (whole roster)