Draft preview

The Sixers have three picks in the first round of tomorrow night's draft, so here's an early look at who they might be picking:

Jeff Green, SF, Georgetown
Pros: “Great basketball IQ” according to ESPN.com. I guess that means he understands when the ball goes in the bucket, its worth either two or three points.
Cons: Scouts question his passion for making himself a better player. And the last guy they drafted from Georgetown with questions like that tended not to show up for practice.

Julian Wright, SF, Kansas
Pros: Has both “tremendous upside” and “great length” according to NBA.com. If the had “explosive quickness” too, he’d have the cliché trifecta.
Cons: Dude’s name is Julian. He might be a girl. And most of those WNBA players stink.

Acie Law IV, PG, Texas A&M
Pros: “Loves to have the ball in his hands at key moments” according to SI.com. That’s good, since the entire offense runs through the point guard.
Cons: The Sixers have struggled for years with two AIs. Adding an AC probably isn’t the answer.

Kevin Kolb, QB, Houston
Pros: “Good arm strength and ability to run the offense” according to NFL.com.
Cons: He might still be available in the second round, after all the good players have been taken. Also, like the Eagles, the Sixers don’t need another QB.

Chase Utley, 2B, UCLA
Pros: Arguably one of the best athletes in Philadelphia since Mike Schmidt. Good arm, great defense could be real assets to a no-name Sixers team.
Cons: At 6-1 he's a bit short, even for a point guard. Also, he's gonna be a little busy when Sixers training camp opens in late August.

No one, no position, no school
Pros: According to the draft experts, after the top two picks "no one" is expected to be a huge star in the league. Also, picking "no one" won't leave fans disappointed when he blows.
Cons: The Sixers already have "nobody" playing defense and "hardly anyone" scoring, so it might be a tough team to rally fans behind.

Kobe Bryant, SG, never went to college
Pros: Philly boy (sorta) who wants out of LA (sorta) could be traded for a number of draft picks (maybe) and revitalize his image in the Eastern Conference (probably not).
Cons: Fans would much, much rather see "no one" picked up before this jerk.

To help put it in perspective

As the Phillies inch closer and closer towards that 10,000th loss, here's a visual representation to help you get your mind around it:











Yep, that's 9,991 pictures of Kim Batiste, which I feel like is a good summary for the Phillies history.

First fantasy football post of the season

It’s that time of year again

Since there’s only 69 days left until my fantasy football live draft for the pay league (no, I’m not kidding, they already set it up) I wanted to take a peek at some of the proposed scoring rules we’re considering for this year:

1 – You can draft LT on even weeks or odd ones, not both
** Frankly, even with half his production LaDanian Tomlinson is a better pick than most players. If we did this last year, he would have been the ninth and 10th best RBs available.

2 – Coach draft: One point per pound lost
** Andy Reid seems like a no-brainer here, but remember he already slimmed down to just under 700 pound last season. The sleeper pick here is Falcons’ coach Bobby Petrino, who may be eaten alive when crazy Mike Vick goes cannibal. That’s 230 points right there.

3 – Raiders players to be included in the draft
** It seems odd to include minor leaguers in with everyone else, but if the NFL is going to do it we might as well let the idiots in our league do the same. So feel free to grab Jamarcus Russell early.

4 – Five-point penalty per player suicide attempt
** This will be referred to as the "T.O. rule" from this point forward. No extra penalty if he's successful.

5 – 50-point bonus for drafting Akers
** Just because.

Checking in on the local teams

Heard on the radio first thing this morning:

"Orioles fans.....

"Brian Roberts came back from an early season injury to lead the league in stolen bases and be among the leaders in batting average, on-base percentage and hits over the last month. What will he do over the next month?

"The O's take on the Padres Tuesday night. Don't miss the action."

Let's pretend for a minute that B-Rob could be one of the major draws of the American League (even though currently ranked 72nd in Yahoo's player rankings). Here's what happened to the O's in the next few hours:

-- Manager Sam Perlozzo was canned.

-- The team snapped its eight game losing streak ... by taking a day off.

-- The team was sent out of town. They say its for a six-game road trip, but ...

You can really feel the brob. Don't miss the action.

Sopranos rewrite

Imagine if The Sopranos writers were in charge of finishing off other classics:
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Footloose

McCormack hugs the other teens and walks over to the record player. He puts on Journey's “Escape” album and the sound of “Don’t Stop Believing” fills the auditorium.

McCormack: Let’s dance!

The teens triumphantly take to the dance floor and … fade to black.
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Rocky

Balboa returns to his corner after round 14; his eyes are completely swollen shut, the cut on the side of his brow is still gushing. The ringside doctor wants to stop the fight, but the boxer ignores him.

Mickey: "You can throw in the towel, Rock. Nobody's gonna say ya didn't give ya all. You're just a city boy, born and raised in south detroit ... I mean Philly."

Rocky: "You ain't stopping nothing."

Balboa rises to his feet amid the thundering applause. He walks to the center of the ring for the start of the final round and ... fade to black.
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JFK's inaugaration

The 35th president of the U.S. appears on the steps of the Capitol.

"I do not shrink from this responsibility -- I welcome it. I do not believe that any of us would exchange places with any other people or any other generation.

“Don't stop believing, my friends. Hold on to that feeling. The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this endeavor will light our country and all who serve it.

“And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you..."

Then he walks off the stage.
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Seinfeld

Pretty much the same ending, actually.
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Raiders of the Lost Ark

Belloq recites an ancient Jewish prayer and begins to remove the cover of the ark. The Nazis stand at attention, cherishing the moment of victory.

Indy: Marion! Cover your eyes!

Marion: What?

Indy: Cover your eyes! Some will win, some will lose, some were born to sing the blues!

Belloq peers down into the uncovered relic and sees … the closing credits.

Know your James names

Since he's been in the news lately, it's time for everyone’s favorite game:

Can you correctly identify
King James (the athlete),
King James (the monarch),
or James King (the actress)?

1 – Known for presiding over the Golden Age of Elizabethan literature.
Answer: Click here

2 – Known for presiding over the Golden Age of Cleveland basketball
Answer: Click here

3 – Known for golden hair.
Answer: Click here

4 – Discovered at age 15.
Answer: Click here

5 – Discovered at age 14.
Answer: Click here

6 – Discovered at age 1.
Answer: Click here

7 – Had a bit part in the movie “White Chicks.”
Answer: Click here

8 – Had a bit part in the show “The Simpsons.”
Answer: Click here

9 – Had a bit part in the movie “Pocahontas II.”
Answer: Click here

10 – One of the best basketball players in the world, and a complete asshole.
Answer: Click here

How'd you do? Any fewer than 5 right and you need to start watching some NBA action. Any more than 8 and you need to stop watching Jamie King movies.