Flights so far this trip: 1
Flights anticipated in the next 48 hours: 3
Chances they'll all be on time: 0
UPDATE, 6:48 am: Scratch that, start anticipating flights tomorrow afternoon instead.
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Monday, August 11, 2008
Here we go again
First the awesome news – If I haven’t told you about it yet, please go here and here.
Pretty cool, huh? I’m really full of myself right now.
Then the less awesome news – I’m flying out to Germany this Wednesday, and I’ll be going into Iraq a few days later.
All of you know the deal: Every two years or so, every reporter who works at my paper spends six weeks downrange to report on the troops (that's what we do after all) and what's going on there. It’s not why I took the job, it’s not my favorite thing to do, but it is important work. And as I told Bobert’s mom this weekend, if they sent someone else the writing wouldn’t be as good, because I’m awesome.
I’m scheduled back in the states on Sept. 23, which means I’ll be gone for three Eagles games and a bunch of critical Phillies match-ups. Both teams will still be in first when I leave the country. You all are in charge of keeping it that way.
I’ll have email and I’ll plan on updating the blog again, although circumstances and reliable internet access could limit that. I’ll try and do my weekly NFL wrap ups for my three fans out there (thanks, moms!) but it’ll probably be a little different than in the past. But say a prayer and keep your fingers crossed and I’ll be back before anyone notices I’m gone.
And this all means it’ll be that much sweeter when I win the fantasy football league, because I’ll be able to say I’m awesome no matter what continent I’m on.
All of you stay safe until I get back, and start planning a late Labor Day party for the end of September.
Pretty cool, huh? I’m really full of myself right now.
Then the less awesome news – I’m flying out to Germany this Wednesday, and I’ll be going into Iraq a few days later.
All of you know the deal: Every two years or so, every reporter who works at my paper spends six weeks downrange to report on the troops (that's what we do after all) and what's going on there. It’s not why I took the job, it’s not my favorite thing to do, but it is important work. And as I told Bobert’s mom this weekend, if they sent someone else the writing wouldn’t be as good, because I’m awesome.
I’m scheduled back in the states on Sept. 23, which means I’ll be gone for three Eagles games and a bunch of critical Phillies match-ups. Both teams will still be in first when I leave the country. You all are in charge of keeping it that way.
I’ll have email and I’ll plan on updating the blog again, although circumstances and reliable internet access could limit that. I’ll try and do my weekly NFL wrap ups for my three fans out there (thanks, moms!) but it’ll probably be a little different than in the past. But say a prayer and keep your fingers crossed and I’ll be back before anyone notices I’m gone.
And this all means it’ll be that much sweeter when I win the fantasy football league, because I’ll be able to say I’m awesome no matter what continent I’m on.
All of you stay safe until I get back, and start planning a late Labor Day party for the end of September.
Tuesday, August 05, 2008
Pre-traveling travels
Highlights of Elkhart, Indiana.
...
Well, there's, ....
...
hmmm.
I'll explain soon, kids. In the meantime, here's something fun from the weekend, in case you missed it.
...
Well, there's, ....
...
hmmm.
I'll explain soon, kids. In the meantime, here's something fun from the weekend, in case you missed it.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Full of Soul
A few thoughts on the Soul "breaking" Philly's championship drought:
1 -- Shut up.
2 -- Just so we're clear, I'm in favor of Philly teams winning anything. I'm in favor of Philly being the best at anything. And I'm most assuredly in favor of anything that brings a free Bon Jovi concert to Philly.
3 -- The drought is the big four, OK? (We're still counting hockey because it's awesome). If we're counting minor league/alternative league sports, then there is no Philly drought. Perhaps you forgot:
*** The Villanova Wildcats, who won the NCAA basketball tourney in 1986;
*** The Philadelphia Phantoms, who won the Calder Cup in 1998 and 2004;
*** The Philadelphia Wings, who won National Lacrosse Championship in 1989, 1990, 1994, 1995, 1998, and 2001;
*** The Philadelphia Kixx, who won the Major Indoor Soccer League Championship in 2002 and 2007;
*** The Philadelphia Barrage, who won the Major League Lacrosse Championship in 2004, 2006 and 2007;
So if we start counting outside the big four, Philly has 10 championships in the last decade alone. But we're not. So shut up.
4 -- I'm glad Jaws got a championship. Everyone wants Jaws to have a championship. We just weren't hoping it'd be this one.
5 -- AFL is fun. I'll have to watch more of it next year. It's a good distraction when Adam Eaton is giving up hits left and right. But it's time for real baseball and real football now, so focus. We've got a drought to deal with.
1 -- Shut up.
2 -- Just so we're clear, I'm in favor of Philly teams winning anything. I'm in favor of Philly being the best at anything. And I'm most assuredly in favor of anything that brings a free Bon Jovi concert to Philly.
3 -- The drought is the big four, OK? (We're still counting hockey because it's awesome). If we're counting minor league/alternative league sports, then there is no Philly drought. Perhaps you forgot:
*** The Villanova Wildcats, who won the NCAA basketball tourney in 1986; *** The Philadelphia Phantoms, who won the Calder Cup in 1998 and 2004;
*** The Philadelphia Wings, who won National Lacrosse Championship in 1989, 1990, 1994, 1995, 1998, and 2001;
*** The Philadelphia Kixx, who won the Major Indoor Soccer League Championship in 2002 and 2007; *** The Philadelphia Barrage, who won the Major League Lacrosse Championship in 2004, 2006 and 2007;
So if we start counting outside the big four, Philly has 10 championships in the last decade alone. But we're not. So shut up.
4 -- I'm glad Jaws got a championship. Everyone wants Jaws to have a championship. We just weren't hoping it'd be this one. 5 -- AFL is fun. I'll have to watch more of it next year. It's a good distraction when Adam Eaton is giving up hits left and right. But it's time for real baseball and real football now, so focus. We've got a drought to deal with.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
When I was 17 ...
OK, 16, actually.
That’s the last time (1993) the Eagles opened training camp with the Phillies in first place in the NL East. What can we learn from that year?
The Good
-- The Phillies finished with five pitchers who won at least 12 games.
-- The Eagles started the season 4-0.
-- The Phillies held onto first and made the playoffs.
-- Underrated Eagles CB Eric Allen had six picks and four TDs, earning him a Pro Bowl berth.
-- The Phillies whooped the Braves in six games in the NLCS.
-- Even by the end of the season, the Eagles had never employed a Detmer of any kind.
The Bad
-- The Phillies didn’t quite win that World Series.
-- QB Bubby Brister was the leading passer for the Eagles on the season.
-- The Phillies three offensive superstars (Dykstra, Daulton, and Kruk) were never as good in future years.
-- The Eagles finished the season 8-8, out of the playoffs.
-- The Phillies helped popularize the terrible jock jam “Whoot, There It Is.”
-- The Cowboys won the Super Bowl.
The Horribly Prophetic
-- The Phillies star closer (Mitch Williams) blew the World Series for them.
-- The Eagles star QB (Randall Cunningham) went down with a season-ending leg injury.
-- The Phillies lost in the Series in large part because of Pat Gillick (then Blue Jays GM).
-- The Eagles kept their coach (Rich Kottitie) despite his deer-in-the-headlights style.
That’s the last time (1993) the Eagles opened training camp with the Phillies in first place in the NL East. What can we learn from that year?
The Good
-- The Phillies finished with five pitchers who won at least 12 games.
-- The Eagles started the season 4-0.
-- The Phillies held onto first and made the playoffs.
-- Underrated Eagles CB Eric Allen had six picks and four TDs, earning him a Pro Bowl berth.
-- The Phillies whooped the Braves in six games in the NLCS.
-- Even by the end of the season, the Eagles had never employed a Detmer of any kind.
The Bad
-- The Phillies didn’t quite win that World Series.
-- QB Bubby Brister was the leading passer for the Eagles on the season.
-- The Phillies three offensive superstars (Dykstra, Daulton, and Kruk) were never as good in future years.
-- The Eagles finished the season 8-8, out of the playoffs.
-- The Phillies helped popularize the terrible jock jam “Whoot, There It Is.”
-- The Cowboys won the Super Bowl.
The Horribly Prophetic
-- The Phillies star closer (Mitch Williams) blew the World Series for them.
-- The Eagles star QB (Randall Cunningham) went down with a season-ending leg injury.
-- The Phillies lost in the Series in large part because of Pat Gillick (then Blue Jays GM).
-- The Eagles kept their coach (Rich Kottitie) despite his deer-in-the-headlights style.
Monday, July 14, 2008
Home Run Derby recap
I know a lot of folks won’t get the chance to watch tonight’s Home Run Derby, so I’m writing a full recap so you don’t miss a minute of the excitement.
8:06 – Chase Utley is announced, and will bat third. The New York faithful sprinkle a few catcalls in with the cheers. Utley, apparently unaware there are cameras everywhere, yells, “Boos? Fuck you too.”
8:10 – For the third time in less than an hour, John Kruk picks Utley to win the Derby. I get it, ESPN. You love your predictions.
8:12 – Joe Morgan picks Utley too; This worries me. Chris Berman asks him if he likes second basemen so much, why didn’t he pick Roger Hornsby. Maybe because Horsnby has been dead for 45 years.
8:17 – Chris Berman announces, “We’re underway!” ESPN cuts to commercial.
8:21 – Finally, we’re actually underway with the second-best 2B in the NL, Dan Uggla of the Florida Fish.
8:22 – Home Run, Dan Uggla!
8:22:30 – Home Run, Dan Uggla!
8:23 – Home Run, Dan Uggla!
8:24 – Home Run, Dan Uggla!
8:26 – Home Run, Dan Uggla!
8:26:30 – Home Run, Dan Uggla!
8:27 – And he’s done. He posted six dingers, a 414-foot average, and a 437-foot longest blast.
8:28 – OMG, they’re not going to commercial.
8:29 – Next comes CF Grady Sizemore of the Cleveland Wahoos. Allegedly he’s leading the AL in homers, even though Cleveland has only scored 15 runs all season.
8:30 – Home Run, Grady Sizemore!
8:30:30 – Home Run, Grady Sizemore!
8:30:45 – Home Run, Grady Sizemore!
8:32 – Home Run, Grady Sizemore!
8:33 – Home Run, Grady Sizemore!
8:34 – Home Run, Grady Sizemore!
8:35 – And he’s done. Another six dinger score, a 440-foot average, and a 459-foot longest blast.
8:37 – I’m surprised no one has mentioned yet that this is the last year for Yankees stadium.
8:39 – Up comes Evan Longoria, 3B for the Tampa Bay not-Devil-Rays and wife of Spurs Guard Tony Parker.
8:40 – Homer, Evan Longoria!
8:41 – Home… nope, that’s foul.
8:42 – Home… nope, that’s foul.
8:42:30 – Home… nope, that’s foul.
8:43 – Homer, Evan Longoria!
8:43:30 – Home… nope, that’s foul.
8:44 – Homer, Evan Longoria!
8:45 – Wow, he blew. Three dingers, a 419 average and one that somehow went 446. I think they might have mismeasured.
8:46 – Now here’s what we’re waiting for….
8:47 – Chase Utley, you are the man!
8:48 – Chase Utley, you are the man!
8:49 – Chase Utley, you are the man!
8:50 – Chase Utley, you are the man!
8:51 – Chase Utley, you are the man!
8:52 – Ugh (ley). Five isn’t very exciting. I was hoping for 26. And they interviewed stinking 3B David Wright of the New York not Yankees while he was at bat. Official tally: Five dingers, a 402 average and one 434 blast.
8:54 – I’m surprised no one has mentioned at least seven times that this is the last year for Yankees stadium. Berman has only said it six times.
8:57 – Now batting: 87-year-old and three-time HR Derby loser 1B Lance Berkman.
8:58 – The old man goes out of the park!
8:59 – The old man goes out of the park!
8:59:30 – The old man goes out of the park!
8:59:45 – The old man goes out of the park!
9:01 – The old man goes out of the park!
9:01:30 – The old man goes out of the park!
9:01:45 – The old man goes out of the park!
9:02 –The old man goes out of the park!
9:03 – OK, eight dingers, 442 average and a 478 long shot. But he’s still ooooooold.
9:05 – As I watch these replays, I can’t describe to you how much less exciting the home runs are than the eight-year-olds fielding these shots. Against Berkman, some kid speared a homer in the stands. Against Utley, one kid had a sliding grab that got a standing ovation.
9:07 – Stepping in is Twins 1B Justin Morneau, and Rick Riley is complaining that this field is “too white.” He wants Ryan Howard and Albert Pujols here.
9:08 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:09 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:10 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:11 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:11:30 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:12 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:12:30 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:13 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:14 – Morneau with eight dingers, a 428 average and a 453 long shot. And thanks to the calculator that is ESPN, I’ve learned that both six and eight are more than five, so Chase Utley is eliminated.
9:15 – Milwaukee Brewer LF Ryan Braun is next up, and this is a real crock. How did he get an invite? Name one Milwaukee player known for hitting home runs.
9:16 – Braun goes long!
9:17 – Braun goes long!
9:17:30 – Braun goes long!
9:18 – Braun goes long!
9:18:30 – Oh yeah, Hank Aaron. Right.
9:19 – Braun goes long!
9:19:30 – Braun goes long!
9:20 – Braun goes long!
9:21 – Slow start, but he makes it to the next round. He ends with seven dingers, a 415 average and a 439 long one.
9:23 – I think he made it to the next round. ESPN didn’t tell me if seven was more than six.
9:27 – Up comes everyone’s favorite drug addict, Texas OF John Hamilton. He has promised to hit one out of the stadium, something no one has ever done.
9:28 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:28:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:29 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:29:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:30:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:31 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:32 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:33 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:34 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:35 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:35:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:36 – Wow, Rick Riley actually just said, “This is a new way for him to get high.” Wow.
9:36:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:37 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:37:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:38 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:39 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:39:30 – Geez, I think the record is 24. Stupid Bobby Abreau.
9:40 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:40:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:41 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:41:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:42 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:43 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:44 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:45 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:45:30 – Um, the record was 24…
9:46 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:47 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:48 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:49 – Wow. That was un-freakin-believable. 28 dingers, a bunch of them over 500 feet. A 445-foot average, and a long of 518 feet. Total distance of those homers: Just over two miles…
9:50 – Erin Andrews just interviewed Hamilton’s 71-year-old American Legion coach, who throws batting practice for him and was the pitcher for that ridiculous display. Poor guy had to throw 56 pitches. Both men are beaming, but the geezer can barely hold his arm up.
9:52 – And that was a great ending to this scheduled two-hour event. Hamilton better stay sober, because he was the feel-good story of baseball before tonight, and is only gonna be hyped even more now. But that kid had Yankee stadium jumping up and down.
9:55 – Wait, there are two more rounds of this?
9:57 – As we start the second round … ah, screw it. I’m calling Hamilton the winner and changing the channel.
8:06 – Chase Utley is announced, and will bat third. The New York faithful sprinkle a few catcalls in with the cheers. Utley, apparently unaware there are cameras everywhere, yells, “Boos? Fuck you too.”
8:10 – For the third time in less than an hour, John Kruk picks Utley to win the Derby. I get it, ESPN. You love your predictions.
8:12 – Joe Morgan picks Utley too; This worries me. Chris Berman asks him if he likes second basemen so much, why didn’t he pick Roger Hornsby. Maybe because Horsnby has been dead for 45 years.
8:17 – Chris Berman announces, “We’re underway!” ESPN cuts to commercial.
8:21 – Finally, we’re actually underway with the second-best 2B in the NL, Dan Uggla of the Florida Fish.
8:22 – Home Run, Dan Uggla!
8:22:30 – Home Run, Dan Uggla!
8:23 – Home Run, Dan Uggla!
8:24 – Home Run, Dan Uggla!
8:26 – Home Run, Dan Uggla!
8:26:30 – Home Run, Dan Uggla!
8:27 – And he’s done. He posted six dingers, a 414-foot average, and a 437-foot longest blast.
8:28 – OMG, they’re not going to commercial.
8:29 – Next comes CF Grady Sizemore of the Cleveland Wahoos. Allegedly he’s leading the AL in homers, even though Cleveland has only scored 15 runs all season.
8:30 – Home Run, Grady Sizemore!
8:30:30 – Home Run, Grady Sizemore!
8:30:45 – Home Run, Grady Sizemore!
8:32 – Home Run, Grady Sizemore!
8:33 – Home Run, Grady Sizemore!
8:34 – Home Run, Grady Sizemore!
8:35 – And he’s done. Another six dinger score, a 440-foot average, and a 459-foot longest blast.
8:37 – I’m surprised no one has mentioned yet that this is the last year for Yankees stadium.
8:39 – Up comes Evan Longoria, 3B for the Tampa Bay not-Devil-Rays and wife of Spurs Guard Tony Parker.
8:40 – Homer, Evan Longoria!
8:41 – Home… nope, that’s foul.
8:42 – Home… nope, that’s foul.
8:42:30 – Home… nope, that’s foul.
8:43 – Homer, Evan Longoria!
8:43:30 – Home… nope, that’s foul.
8:44 – Homer, Evan Longoria!
8:45 – Wow, he blew. Three dingers, a 419 average and one that somehow went 446. I think they might have mismeasured.
8:46 – Now here’s what we’re waiting for….
8:47 – Chase Utley, you are the man!
8:48 – Chase Utley, you are the man!
8:49 – Chase Utley, you are the man!
8:50 – Chase Utley, you are the man!
8:51 – Chase Utley, you are the man!
8:52 – Ugh (ley). Five isn’t very exciting. I was hoping for 26. And they interviewed stinking 3B David Wright of the New York not Yankees while he was at bat. Official tally: Five dingers, a 402 average and one 434 blast.
8:54 – I’m surprised no one has mentioned at least seven times that this is the last year for Yankees stadium. Berman has only said it six times.
8:57 – Now batting: 87-year-old and three-time HR Derby loser 1B Lance Berkman.
8:58 – The old man goes out of the park!
8:59 – The old man goes out of the park!
8:59:30 – The old man goes out of the park!
8:59:45 – The old man goes out of the park!
9:01 – The old man goes out of the park!
9:01:30 – The old man goes out of the park!
9:01:45 – The old man goes out of the park!
9:02 –The old man goes out of the park!
9:03 – OK, eight dingers, 442 average and a 478 long shot. But he’s still ooooooold.
9:05 – As I watch these replays, I can’t describe to you how much less exciting the home runs are than the eight-year-olds fielding these shots. Against Berkman, some kid speared a homer in the stands. Against Utley, one kid had a sliding grab that got a standing ovation.
9:07 – Stepping in is Twins 1B Justin Morneau, and Rick Riley is complaining that this field is “too white.” He wants Ryan Howard and Albert Pujols here.
9:08 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:09 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:10 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:11 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:11:30 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:12 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:12:30 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:13 – A four-bagger for Morneau!
9:14 – Morneau with eight dingers, a 428 average and a 453 long shot. And thanks to the calculator that is ESPN, I’ve learned that both six and eight are more than five, so Chase Utley is eliminated.
9:15 – Milwaukee Brewer LF Ryan Braun is next up, and this is a real crock. How did he get an invite? Name one Milwaukee player known for hitting home runs.
9:16 – Braun goes long!
9:17 – Braun goes long!
9:17:30 – Braun goes long!
9:18 – Braun goes long!
9:18:30 – Oh yeah, Hank Aaron. Right.
9:19 – Braun goes long!
9:19:30 – Braun goes long!
9:20 – Braun goes long!
9:21 – Slow start, but he makes it to the next round. He ends with seven dingers, a 415 average and a 439 long one.
9:23 – I think he made it to the next round. ESPN didn’t tell me if seven was more than six.
9:27 – Up comes everyone’s favorite drug addict, Texas OF John Hamilton. He has promised to hit one out of the stadium, something no one has ever done.
9:28 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:28:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:29 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:29:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:30:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:31 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:32 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:33 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:34 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:35 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:35:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:36 – Wow, Rick Riley actually just said, “This is a new way for him to get high.” Wow.
9:36:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:37 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:37:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:38 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:39 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:39:30 – Geez, I think the record is 24. Stupid Bobby Abreau.
9:40 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:40:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:41 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:41:30 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:42 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:43 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:44 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:45 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:45:30 – Um, the record was 24…
9:46 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:47 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:48 – Crack! Hamilton is high … with that hit!
9:49 – Wow. That was un-freakin-believable. 28 dingers, a bunch of them over 500 feet. A 445-foot average, and a long of 518 feet. Total distance of those homers: Just over two miles…
9:50 – Erin Andrews just interviewed Hamilton’s 71-year-old American Legion coach, who throws batting practice for him and was the pitcher for that ridiculous display. Poor guy had to throw 56 pitches. Both men are beaming, but the geezer can barely hold his arm up.
9:52 – And that was a great ending to this scheduled two-hour event. Hamilton better stay sober, because he was the feel-good story of baseball before tonight, and is only gonna be hyped even more now. But that kid had Yankee stadium jumping up and down.
9:55 – Wait, there are two more rounds of this?
9:57 – As we start the second round … ah, screw it. I’m calling Hamilton the winner and changing the channel.
Sunday, July 06, 2008
Thursday, July 03, 2008
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
Don't panic?
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Reasons for the Phils' slide
What's ailing the boys in red, according to recent analysis from 610 WIP:
-- Donovan McNabb
-- Donovan McNabb's parents
-- Donovan McNabb's inability to complete short passes
-- Donovan McNabb's inability to work with other superstars
-- Utley's inability to hit curveballs (because of McNabb)
-- Andy Reid
-- Donovan McNabb
-- Donovan McNabb's parents
-- Donovan McNabb's inability to complete short passes
-- Donovan McNabb's inability to work with other superstars
-- Utley's inability to hit curveballs (because of McNabb)
-- Andy Reid
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Alternate jobs for Mr. One-for-Six
Currently Phils first baseman is second in the league in Home Runs but batting under .220. He has more RBI (62) than hits (60). Ever wonder what he'll do if this baseball thing doesn't work out?
If Ryan were your mailman ...
No mail would be delivered on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, or Thursday.
Every Friday, you'd receive a check from Publisher's Clearing House.
If Ryan went to Hollywood ...
He'd get bit parts in the next four installments of the Police Academy series.
Then he'd get an Oscar for his interpretation of Richard III.
If Ryan were a brewmaster ...
The first five beers of every six pack would be Pabst Blue Ribbon.
The sixth in each one would be Yuengling Premium.
If Ryan manned this blog ...
The first five posts every month would blow.
The sixth would be hilarious.
OK, so not much would change there.
If Ryan were your mailman ...
No mail would be delivered on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, or Thursday.
Every Friday, you'd receive a check from Publisher's Clearing House.
If Ryan went to Hollywood ...
He'd get bit parts in the next four installments of the Police Academy series.
Then he'd get an Oscar for his interpretation of Richard III.
If Ryan were a brewmaster ...
The first five beers of every six pack would be Pabst Blue Ribbon.
The sixth in each one would be Yuengling Premium.
If Ryan manned this blog ...
The first five posts every month would blow.
The sixth would be hilarious.
OK, so not much would change there.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Tuesday, June 03, 2008
Too bad he can't afford a soul
How the biggest jerk in the NFL plans to spend that $34 million in blood money:
$600 for a replica Super Bowl ring (closest he'll get to a real one)
$4.95 for a days of the week pill box
$1.7 million for a new car to compensate for, um, stuff
$3.00 for premium popcorn
$12.49 for his best-selling jersey
$15 for video of the last time the 'boys won a playoff game
$1,000 in an effort to cover the stench of his rotting heart
$5,999.99 for 1,000 unused (and unwanted) T.O towels
$600 for a replica Super Bowl ring (closest he'll get to a real one)$4.95 for a days of the week pill box$1.7 million for a new car to compensate for, um, stuff$3.00 for premium popcorn$12.49 for his best-selling jersey$15 for video of the last time the 'boys won a playoff game$1,000 in an effort to cover the stench of his rotting heart$5,999.99 for 1,000 unused (and unwanted) T.O towels
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Monday, May 19, 2008
Calculate your suffering
In case you missed it, both Sports Illustrated and the Inky had stories about Philly passing its 100th season since the city's last championship with the Flyers loss yesterday. The SI list hits the top 10 pretty well too, absolutely nailing the worst moment of the drought (yeah, that game).
But with all due respect to those fine publications, the NHL didn't have a season in 2004. So that puts the drought at 99 seasons, including one strike-shortened baseball season where no one won a championship.
Still, it was nice to see someone put this chart up so I could appreciate Boston's pain.
But with all due respect to those fine publications, the NHL didn't have a season in 2004. So that puts the drought at 99 seasons, including one strike-shortened baseball season where no one won a championship.
Still, it was nice to see someone put this chart up so I could appreciate Boston's pain.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Monday, May 12, 2008
No Philly sports today!
Thanks to two playoff runs at the Wachovia Center and several scheduling quirks, today is the first time in 47 consecutive days (March 26, for those who want to check the math) that the Phillies, Flyers or Sixers aren't suiting up and competing against someone. And if you want to include the Phils spring training games, today is the first time in 78 days (Feb. 24) that there are no Philly scores to check on.
I can't imagine that's any sort of record -- in the fall, all four teams are playing at the same time, at least with pre-season games -- but it is a nice chance to calm down for a day.
Although, I had to see that stupid "T.O. acting" report all day, so my blood pressure is still up pretty high.
I can't imagine that's any sort of record -- in the fall, all four teams are playing at the same time, at least with pre-season games -- but it is a nice chance to calm down for a day.
Although, I had to see that stupid "T.O. acting" report all day, so my blood pressure is still up pretty high.
Friday, May 09, 2008
Getting ready for tonight
In case you forgot that tonight's Flyers game is against a true rival, here's a quick look at the history of bad blood between Pittsburgh and Philly:
1939 – The Philadelphia Eagles upend the Pittsburgh Steelers, 17-14, in the first-ever game Thanksgiving Day game for both teams. On radio, the play-by-play is handled by a then 60-years-young Myron Cope.
1947 – The Pittsburgh Ironmen finish their first and only basketball season with a 15-45 record. The Philadelphia Warriors finish their inaugural season that year as well, but it takes them seven more years before posting their first 40-loss campaign.
1953 – After the Eagles sweep their season series against the Steelers with a pair of double-digit victories, a distraught Jonas Salk unsuccessfully tries to find a cure for sports despair in his University of Pittsburgh lab, but instead stumbles upon a polio vaccine. He later neglects to thank Philadelphia for the inspiration.
1976 – Rocky, the story of an underdog boxer whose life reflects his hometown's inspirational spirit, wins the Academy Award for Best Picture. Pittsburgh attempts it's own theatrical reflection of itself later the same year -- Dawn of the Dead hits theater screens in 1978.
1987 – 3B Mike Schmidt hits his 500th home run – a 9th inning, game winner – in Pittsburgh to push the Phils over the Pirates 8-6. The Pirates have not won a game since.
2000 – In the third longest game in NHL history, the Flyers take the Penguins into five overtimes before Philly C Keith Primeau nets the game-winner over the shoulder of Pittsburgh G Ron Tugnutt. Philly fans celebrate in gentlemanly fashion by declining to go for the easy Tugnutt notes.
2002 – Former Philadelphia mayor Ed Rendell is elected governor of Pennsylvania despite carrying only six counties in the state’s democratic primary. Shortly thereafter, all official state maps are reworked to close the PA border 30 miles further east, assigning Pittsburgh as part of West Virginia.
2007 – Temple researchers discover populated areas located in the 300-mile no-man's-zone between Pittsburgh and Philadelphia. No one cares.
1939 – The Philadelphia Eagles upend the Pittsburgh Steelers, 17-14, in the first-ever game Thanksgiving Day game for both teams. On radio, the play-by-play is handled by a then 60-years-young Myron Cope.
1947 – The Pittsburgh Ironmen finish their first and only basketball season with a 15-45 record. The Philadelphia Warriors finish their inaugural season that year as well, but it takes them seven more years before posting their first 40-loss campaign.
1953 – After the Eagles sweep their season series against the Steelers with a pair of double-digit victories, a distraught Jonas Salk unsuccessfully tries to find a cure for sports despair in his University of Pittsburgh lab, but instead stumbles upon a polio vaccine. He later neglects to thank Philadelphia for the inspiration.
1976 – Rocky, the story of an underdog boxer whose life reflects his hometown's inspirational spirit, wins the Academy Award for Best Picture. Pittsburgh attempts it's own theatrical reflection of itself later the same year -- Dawn of the Dead hits theater screens in 1978.
1987 – 3B Mike Schmidt hits his 500th home run – a 9th inning, game winner – in Pittsburgh to push the Phils over the Pirates 8-6. The Pirates have not won a game since.
2000 – In the third longest game in NHL history, the Flyers take the Penguins into five overtimes before Philly C Keith Primeau nets the game-winner over the shoulder of Pittsburgh G Ron Tugnutt. Philly fans celebrate in gentlemanly fashion by declining to go for the easy Tugnutt notes.
2002 – Former Philadelphia mayor Ed Rendell is elected governor of Pennsylvania despite carrying only six counties in the state’s democratic primary. Shortly thereafter, all official state maps are reworked to close the PA border 30 miles further east, assigning Pittsburgh as part of West Virginia.
2007 – Temple researchers discover populated areas located in the 300-mile no-man's-zone between Pittsburgh and Philadelphia. No one cares.
Tuesday, May 06, 2008
Posting problems
Folks -- hoping you can help me out. Every time I try and throw something up on this site about the Flyers, I get this error message:
Any idea what that's about?
Any idea what that's about?
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