1 -- When the "real" referees come back, there will be zero tolerance for the kind of idiotic calls and lengthy play stoppages we're seeing now. Every time one happens, the entire country will shout out "I thought we got rid of the incompetent ones." It will shame the regular refs into doing their job better than ever before.
2 -- The replacement refs did what the NFL could never do: Make a dreadfully dull 14-12 Monday Night Football game into something worth talking about for weeks.
3 -- The NFL is a $9 billion industry and they're fighting with the refs union over $5 million in compensation. This proves once and for all just how greedy the teams owners are. That's like paying for a $100 dinner and refusing to tip your server a nickle.
4 -- The botched call in Seattle's win screwed over Packers fans, the fourth-most insufferable fan base in the NFL (behind the Cowboys, Giants and Steelers fans, in order).
5 -- ESPN was coming dangerously close to devoting some of its airtime to covering the impending baseball playoffs, but the manufactured horror over the replacement refs' blown calls ended that quickly. There is a good chance that Chris Berman's head will actually explode after the next blown call.
6 -- The poor officiating has led to longer games, which in turn means football is on TV for longer. That's always a good thing, right?
7 -- I don't care what your opinion on labor negotiations is. Watching grown men forget how to add penalty yards together while 300 pound linemen fume is always hilarious.
QB: Ben Roethlisberger, 40.16 pts -- started by JoelWR: AJ Green, 28.30 pts -- started by Jim
RB: Jamaal Charles, 38.97 pts -- started by Paul
TE: Heath Miller, 24.00 pts -- started by Sam
K: Ryan Succop, 21.00 pts -- on the wire
DEF: Arizona, 27.00 pts -- started by Dad
D: Justin Houston, 14.50 pts -- on the wire
Everyone of the top performers this week came from the AFC, except for the Arizona defense. You can blame that on Mike Vick too.
"Skill" players edition3rd place: Joe Adams, -1.90 pts -- on the wire
2nd place: Jordan Shipley, -1.80 pts -- on the wire
1st place: LaRod Stephens-Howling, -1.16 pts -- on the wire
And speaking of failures, congratulations to the Saints and the Browns, who have already been eliminated from playoff contention. Since 1990, only three of 107 teams to start the season with three straight losses have made the postseason. On the plus side, fans from both cities can start looking ahead to NBA season and their championship-caliber basketball teams.
** The Eagles are on pace for a -32 turnover differential this season (-6 so far). The record for the worst differential is -30, by the 1965 Pittsburgh Steelers.
** The Eagles are on pace for 32 lost fumbles this season (6 so far). The record for the most fumbles lost is 36, by the 1959 Chicago Cardinals.
** Eagles QB Mike Vick is on pace for 48 turnovers this season (6 INTs, 3 fumbles lost). The record for individual turnovers in a season is 44, by Houston Oilers QB/K George Blanda in 1962.
For the record, the Eagles are 2-1 and have a -19 point differential. The Saints are 0-3 and have a -19 point differential. So, this could be much worse.
On Friday, the Washington Post ran the front-page headline: "Smile, Washington: After 79 years, you're in the playoffs." On Sunday, they wrote that Natinals pitcher Gio Gonzalez became the franchise's first 20-game winner since 1978.
Look, I love using my imagination as much as the next guy, but the local folks seem to think their long dreadful baseball past rivals that of real sports cities. The team has been in DC for seven years. That's it. You don't get to claim records before then, and you don't get to claim pain and suffering for years when there was no team. Everyone in DC was an Orioles fan before 2005 anyway.
If the DC fans down here (all seven of them) get to start complaining about a lack of wins when they didn't have anyone to root for, then Baltimore gets to whine about their lack of Stanley Cup and NBA championships.
** Overtime is not sudden death anymore ... unless you score an offensive TD, a defensive TD, a special teams TD, or a safety. If you get one of those, the game ends immediately.
** You can't win overtime on a field goal on your first possession anymore ... unless the other team already missed a field goal, or they fumbled, or they threw an interception, or if they punted. Then you can win on your first possession. But it's not sudden death.
** If a team has a field goal blocked on its opening possession, but the ball doesn't go past the line of scrimmage, and the kicking team picks up the blocked ball and runs for a first down, then later kicks a field goal, the other team still gets a chance to score before the game is over. But if a team has a field goal blocked on its opening possession, and the ball does go past the line of scrimmage, but the blocking team touches it and the kicking team recovers the loose ball and runs for a first down, and then later kicks a field goal, then the blocking team doesn't get a chance and the game is over. Simple!
** There are no ties anymore -- games continue until a winner is decided. That means the last tie game in NFL history was in November 2008, when the Bengals played to a 13-13 draw against the Philadelphia ... ah, crap, McNabb still thinks they have another quarter to play in that game.
When I saw that Fullback Lawrence Vickers had signed with the Cowboys this offseason, I thought it was a perfect fit. because I knew this guy was evil. And it's not just my superior insight. Everyone has known for a while this guys was evil. His opponents knew it. His teammates knew it. The coaches and refs knew it. Hell, even the replacement refs know it. Just look at what his name clearly spells out: ** Dallas Cowboys new FB Lawrence Blanchard Vickers
Scab clown refs cry "Knew he was evil -- a drab, banal clod"
For the love of Pete Phios, these replacement refs don't even know how to count to four downs. And despite their diminished mental faculties, those simpletons can see the blackness in the Cowboys' roster's soul. And yet the local authorities won't arrest them for crimes against humanity. This country has lost its moral center.
Week 3 standings
Bob Dammit, how is he still in first place? Again, no offense to our resident professor, but if a team quarterbacked by Tony Romo is in first place, the whole league is a sham. You might as well hire incompetent scab refs and just let them decide games however they want.
** Finally, I managed to pick a few games right against Dad. I went 3-2 against him this weekend, trimming his yearly lead down to 5. I would have done better if I didn't pick the Eagles to win in Arizona. I won't be putting that kind of faith in that team again anytime soon.** Remember all those passing stats I posted last week? On Saturday, Old Dominion quarterback Taylor Heinicke threw for 730 yards and five TDs in his team's 64-61 win over New Hampshire. It's more impressive than the 736-yard performance I noted earlier, because that was a Division II game, and Heinicke plays in what sane people still call I-AA. He's averaging over 480 yards a game this season.
** Eagles lost this weekend. Phillies dropped games on Saturday and Sunday. Temple football lost. Penn football lost. Authorities believe they've found an 87-year-old Nazi war criminal hiding in Philadelphia. Not a good weekend for the city.
No comments:
Post a Comment