2011 fantasy recap, week 10

WR DeSean Jackson missed Sunday's Eagles' loss on Sunday after being suspended by the team for missing a team meeting earlier in the week. How did he spend the day?

** Practiced his pre-end-zone touchdown celebrations.
** Caught one fewer pass than Jason "great hands" Avant (1 catch, 2 yards).
** Called up T.O., asked for negotiating advice with Eagles management.
** Found QB Vince Young's hiding place, kicked him out for a few hours.
** Thanked his lucky stars he wasn't part of that embarrassment.

QB: Aaron Rodgers, 36.10 pts -- started by Bobert
RB: Arian Foster, 31.20 pts -- started by Ant
WR: Larry Fitzgerald, 28.30 pts -- started by ChampMike
TE: Rob Gronkowski, 27.53 pts -- started by Ant
K: John Kasay, 18.00 pts -- started by me
DEF: Chicago, 38.00 pts -- started by Dad
D: Rob Ninkovich, 13.00 pts -- on the wire

Gotta be honest -- I'm getting a little sick of Aaron Rodgers posting the top QB score. This is his fourth time up there.

The top unowned player on the week? That would be young Cardinals QB John Skelton. He had three passing TDs and averaged fewer than 170 yards a game in his only six starts before Sunday, but posted three TDs and 315 yards against that vaunted Eagles defense. And, for those of you counting at home, he now has one more win on the season (two) than former Eagles QB Kevin Kolb (one).

"Playing like the Eagles" edition
3rd place: David Reed, -1.10 pts -- on the wire
2nd place: Josh Johnson, -2.00 pts -- on the wire
1st place: Buffalo, -6.00 pts -- on Ant's bench

Congrats to the Bills defense, who managed the worst possible defensive score and the worst score on the year in their blowout loss to the Cowboys on Sunday. They allowed 44 pts, recorded no turnovers and no sacks, and just generally sucked.

Speaking of people who sucked on Sunday, Mike Vick posted a 32.5 QB rating on Sunday, throwing for 128 yards and two INTs. How bad was that? Your QB rating (0 completions, 0 yards, 0 INTs) on Sunday was 39.6. So congrats. You were a better football player and a better person than Vick this week.

Despite a 3-1 record as a starter, Broncos QB Tim Tebow received new criticism this week because his 17-10 win over the Chiefs featured only two completed passes (one was a 56-yard TD). However, the NFL has a rich history of wins despite sub-par QB play. Tebow's performance was the third time since 2000 that a QB has completed two or fewer passes and won. And Tebow's QB rating was three times better than Mike Vick's day.

In fact, in the Super Bowl era, five men have won while posting a QB rating of 0.00 (and another one has tied). Here's a look at those memorable performances:

** 1976: Giants 12, Redskins 9
QB Norm Snead, 3 of 14, 26 yards, 2 INTs
** 1973: Cardinals 30, Cowboys 3
QB Gary Keithley, 6 of 20, 30 yards, 2 INTs
** 1971: Vikings 29, Lions 10
QB Gary Cuozzo, 4 of 15, 21 yards, 2 INTs
** 1970: Chiefs 6, Cardinals 6
QB Len Dawson, 4 of 14, 38 yards, 2 INTs
** 1970: Browns 15, Steelers 7
QB Don Gault, 1 of 16, 44 yards, 2 INTs
** 1967: Vikings 10, Packers 7
QB Joe Kapp, 2 of 11, 25 yards, 2 INTs

In the interest of full disclosure, the 47 other times QBs posted a 0.00 rating in games over that span, the team lost. Still, 5-47-1 is a better win percentage then I would have guessed.

Sometimes the most obvious statements are the dumbest ones. During Sunday's Dolphins game, with the Maryland Racial Slurs trailing by 11, analyst Tim Ryan back the Slurs' decision to try a 48-yard FG in the waning moments of the game because "you're down by two scores. That's the right call." Presumably, someone in the audience was thinking they should punt and concede the game.

But, fine, whatever. Announcers have to fill time, right? So explain this Joe Buck gem, delivered before a commercial break with the 49ers leading the Giants 12-6 in the third quarter on Sunday:

"The Giants trail by six. We'll talk about that when we get back."

Isn't that what you're supposed to be doing? If not the game you're announcing, what else would you be talking about when you get back? The Monday night game? Baseball? Your big fat head?

We'll talk about his big fat head when we get back next week.

Reasons why "The Sing Off" is more watchable than "Monday Night Football"

** "The Sing Off" actually starts on time, and doesn't include three hours of pre-show introductions.

** None of the singers on "The Sing Off" have compared the president to Hitler.

** "The Sing Off" always finishes before midnight.

** Almost no erectile disfunction commercials on "The Sing Off" and no "NASCAR Now" ads.

** "The Sing Off" has no John Gruden.

Dallas is within striking distance of first place in the NFC East again, thanks to Sunday's win and the Giants' loss. Their resurgence is due in large part to a marked improvement in their running game, posting more than 650 yards in the last four games. But can they keep it up? Let's look at their lead blocker to see how game ready he is:

Dallas Cowboys FB Tony Fiammetta
** My football face is bad, most tawny.
** My football wisdom be nasty. A fact.
** My football body was fat. Can me sit?

The word "fail" also features prominently in his name too, but that'd be too easy.

Week 10 standings
If you felt that sudden chill this week, like Hell freezing over, don't worry -- that was just Ant taking over first place. But can he hold on to it?

** Dad and I split our picks this week, so I'm still two down. I'm considering attempting a two-point conversion next week to break out of this slump.

** Trade deadline for the league is this Friday. We've only had one trade this year, so if you've been saving up a good swap, now is the time.

** Thursday night football again this week. I don't know why the NFL hates you. They just do.

** Got my Eagles gear catalog in the mail today. Vick and DeSean Jackson jerseys starting as low as $75. Not good timing, folks.