OK, I’ll be that guy.
Everyone is all jazzed in Philly about how good the team looks and what their potential is. But there are huge red flags with this squad, and fans should be realistic about their ceiling.
For starters, the second-half offense has been dreadful. The team has shown only sporadic signs of life, and hasn’t been able sustain any momentum.
The defense is still shaky. Yes, they made improvements, especially in the middle of the field. But it still feels soft, and you have to worry when they’re going to make a key mistake and cost the team a game.
And let’s talk about leadership. Do you have confidence that the stars on this team can step up and be leaders? Sure, the new guys have looked great, and the young guys are coming along nicely. But great teams have those intangibles in the locker room, and right now you have to question whether these guys have that.
So, everyone needs to calm down. Yes, things have gone better than expected. But for everyone thinking about a deep playoff run for this group, there needs to be a dose of realism.
The fact is even with all their accomplishments so far, the Phillies are still only a sixth place team in the East. A playoff spot isn’t guaranteed.
Now, if you want to talk about a team to get irrationally excited about, it’s the Eagles. It’s pretty obvious that 15-2 is the worst this team can finish and I’ve already booked tickets to Arizona for the Super Bowl in February. That’s a sure thing.
WR: DeVonta Smith, 21.51 pts — started by Mom D
RB: Khalil Herbert, 30.00 pts — on the wire
TE: Mark Andrews, 21.93 pts — started by Ant
K: Greg Zuerlein, 18.00 pts — on the wire
DEF: (tie) Philadelphia, 21.00 pts — started by Joel
DEF: (tie) Denver, 21.00 pts — started by Sam
D: Denzel Ward, 11.50 pts — on the wire
We’re just three weeks into the season and Jackson, the former MVP, already has 12 total TDs and a 20-point lead in the fantasy standings. As someone who had him on a fantasy team last year, when he stunk, and this year, when he is awesome, I’m feeling somewhat conflicted right now. But I’ll take the points.
Welcome to the top performers, DeVonta Smith. All it took was a career day featuring eight catches for 169 yds, one TD, a 12-yard rush and an afternoon of embarrassing the Commie secondary. Not bad for a guy who everyone thought was washed up after a bad week one.
I don’t know how a Bears RB got on this list, I assure you the league is investigating now.
“Players we own” edition3rd place: CJ Beathard, -0.10 pts — on the wire
2nd place: Sky Moore, -1.76 pts — on my bench
1st place: Chargers, -6.00 pts — started by Mike
Sky Moore was my deep pick to be a surprise rookie this year, since the Chiefs have no clear top wideout. Instead, he’s worth 2.14 fantasy pts through three games. So it may be time to cut him.
Congrats to the Chargers, the first team to bottom out in defensive fantasy pts this season. Minus-six means they allowed more than 35 pts (38, to be exact) and recorded no turnovers, no sacks and no signs of life. In fairness, though they were facing the vaunted … Jacksonville offense. So that makes sense.
** Here’s a brief recap of the Auburn/Missouri game:
— With two seconds left and the score tied at 14, Missouri lined up for a 28-yard FG … and missed, sending the game into overtime.
— Facing 4th and 12 in overtime, Auburn lined up for a 44-yard FG … and missed … but Missouri jumped offside, so they got another chance. They connected and took a 17-14 lead.
— On Missouri’s second play of overtime, from the 20-yard line, RB Nathaniel Peat ran around the end and down the sideline for a 19-yard gain … at which point he fumbled the ball trying to reach for the goal line. Auburn recovered, Missouri lost, 17-14.
Not sure I’ve ever seen a team work that hard to lose. And I’ve watched a ton of NFC East games over the last decade.
** Headline on NFL.com on Sept. 18, just before the Eagles/Vikings Monday night game: “Will Justin Jefferson become NFL's first 2,000-yard receiver?”
Jefferson’s stat totals since then: two games, nine catches, 62 yds. If he keeps up that pace, he should finish the year with 618 receiving yards, or roughly the same production WR Laviska Shenault had last year. And, by the way, Shenault has two catches for 90 yds and a TD this week, so I’m waiting for his historic profile now.
** NBC word salad chef Chris Collinsworth gave this recap of the day’s action during the first quarter of the Sunday night game:
“The league got more interesting today, didn’t it? The Bills got beat, the Dolphins are in first place. The Giants, the Eagles, those two teams got beat.”
Solid work there. The Dolphins were already tied for first. The Eagles won. The Giants did get beat ... a day later, on Monday Night football. The Bills did lose, so I guess we should be happy that his rambling had a sliver of truth.
The Vikings and Saints square off early Sunday morning in the NFL’s first London game of the year. This will be the first time the NFL has ever played a game in a country ruled by a king (RIP Queen Elizabeth) so the league is making numerous changes to adapt to the new monarchy’s demands:
— An extra “U” will be added to most words in the broadcast to appease the local fans. The game will now feature QBs Kurk Cousins and Jamus Winstun and will be broadcast in America on Fox Sports Netwourk.
— The field will be converted to the metric system. Teams can get a first down after every 9.1 meters.
— Before the game, the fans will stand and sing “God Save the King” instead of the previous tradition of singing “Wonderwall.”
— As a coronation gift, the NFL will give the new king the Jacksonville Jaguars.
— Joe Buck will be beheaded before the game for crimes against the crown, specifically for ruining the English language.
Most of the Cowboys’ rookie class has been quiet so far this season, both on and off the field. That may seem surprising, but when you start to look closer at them, you understand why. Take, for instance, first round draft pick Tyler Smith. The Cowboys said they drafted him because they liked his “intangibles.” What they really liked was what his name clearly spells out:
Dallas Rookie Tackle Tyler Smith
** A total mockery. Lad likes Hitlers.
Liking one Hitler is bad enough. But liking multiple Hitlers? Disgusting. This team has no shame.
** Dad and I split the weekly picks again this week, although I wish we hadn’t. I knew the New Jersey Giants would lose to the Cowboys but was hoping for a 2-2 tie to embarrass both squads. Dad remains up 2 in the season standings, but I’ll fix that next week.
** Since Joanna asked, if the Eagles/Commies game had ended in a 24-2 score, it would not have been the first time in NFL history a game ended on those numbers. In fact, it has happened three other times, including in the 2012 playoffs (when the Giants beat the Falcons). BUT, Sunday’s 24-8 game was only the second time in NFL history a game has ended with that score. The other time was in October 1975 when the Houston Oilers beat the Lions, and who doesn’t remember that epic contest...
** As predicted, the only two undefeated NFL teams left are the Eagles and the Dolphins. And yes, those two teams have met in the Super Bowl before … in Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. So I guess get ready for weeks and weeks of Jim Carrey clips.
Most of the Cowboys’ rookie class has been quiet so far this season, both on and off the field. That may seem surprising, but when you start to look closer at them, you understand why. Take, for instance, first round draft pick Tyler Smith. The Cowboys said they drafted him because they liked his “intangibles.” What they really liked was what his name clearly spells out:
Dallas Rookie Tackle Tyler Smith
** A total mockery. Lad likes Hitlers.
Liking one Hitler is bad enough. But liking multiple Hitlers? Disgusting. This team has no shame.
** Dad and I split the weekly picks again this week, although I wish we hadn’t. I knew the New Jersey Giants would lose to the Cowboys but was hoping for a 2-2 tie to embarrass both squads. Dad remains up 2 in the season standings, but I’ll fix that next week.** Since Joanna asked, if the Eagles/Commies game had ended in a 24-2 score, it would not have been the first time in NFL history a game ended on those numbers. In fact, it has happened three other times, including in the 2012 playoffs (when the Giants beat the Falcons). BUT, Sunday’s 24-8 game was only the second time in NFL history a game has ended with that score. The other time was in October 1975 when the Houston Oilers beat the Lions, and who doesn’t remember that epic contest...
** As predicted, the only two undefeated NFL teams left are the Eagles and the Dolphins. And yes, those two teams have met in the Super Bowl before … in Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. So I guess get ready for weeks and weeks of Jim Carrey clips.
Week 3 standings
Garrity Family Throwdown
1 — Mary Alice's Primo Team (Mom), 3-0/393.18 pts
2 — Del-marvelous Diva (Eileen), 2-1/437.26 pts
3 — Always Runny in Philly (Capt Awesome), 2-1/420.62 pts
4 — Stacked Dead Achterts (Carl), 2-1/355.52 pts
5 — Jimmy's Chicken Shaq (Jim), 2-1/335.48 pts
6 — Mailata Man or Beast? (Dad), 1-2/367.36 pts
7 — Chief Little Owl - JJG (Uncle Jim), 0-3/367.24 pts
8 — America's Losers (Dak Prescott), 0-3/189.66 pts
And we have a new leader in the family clubhouse. Aunt Elieen’s upset of my squad coupled with Mom’s win over Uncle Jim puts both of the Garrity women at the top of the standings. The men sit humbled lower down, for now. (Although I would point out I’m still way ahead of Mom in points).
This was also the first week that Dak Prescott didn’t have the lowest scoring team — they beat Jim’s squad by 10 pts. Lucky for him it wasn’t a head-to-head matchup.
Awesome Cup standings
1 — JJaw dropping skillz (Capt. Awesome), 392.31 pts
2 — Champ For Life (Jo), 388.11 pts
3 — Not That Four Seasons (Ant), 387.73 pts
4 — Ouch! It Hurts (Mom D), 382.75 pts
5 — More Honey Bunches of Goats (Jonathan), 357.32 pts
6 — Mailata's Size 18 Shoes (Dad), 356.69 pts
7 — Patriots Secret Cam (Joel), 355.93 pts
8 — Let's Go Iggles! (Paul), 328.17 pts
9 — Blue Collar Killers (Jeff), 300.89 pts
10 — No One Likes Us We Don't Care (Bob), 287.97 pts
11 — Murder Hornets (Mike), 282.58 pts
12 — Room Temperature Icers (Sam), 271.97 pts
And just like that, the streak is over. Joanna just missed making it a full calendar year atop the Awesome Cup leaderboard, but Lamar Jackson and my team did just enough to spoil her fun, at least for a moment. With just 4.2 pts separating our teams, I’m not running any victory laps yet.
Mom D actually had the best week of any team, totaling 154.71 pts and pulling herself up from 8th place to 4th. At the other end, Mike continues to tumble, thanks in large part to that negative Chargers defense and the continued ineptitude of Russell Wilson.
Now is a good time to get those rosters set for the Thursday night game — a Dolphins/Bengals matchup with a lot of key fantasy guys involved. And that stupid Saints/Vikings game starts at 930am, so make sure to check your roster again on Saturday night. And then twice on Sunday. You know what? Just stare at your team until this time next week, when I get the next recap up.
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