2010 fantasy recap, week 10

A short list of teams who scored fewer points in four quarters this week than Eagles QB Mike Vick had in the first half alone on Monday night:

** Vick -- 30 pts (Five TDs in the first half)
** Dolphins -- 29 pts
** Chiefs -- 29 pts
** Redskins -- 28 pts
** Bears -- 27 pts
** Jets -- 26 pts
** Steelers -- 26 pts
** Falcons -- 26 pts
** Texans -- 24 pts
** Colts -- 23 pts
** 49ers -- 23 pts
** Ravens -- 21 pts
** Rams -- 20 pts
** Browns -- 20 pts
** Giants -- 20 pts
** Cardinals -- 18 pts
** Titans -- 17 pts
** Bengals -- 17 pts
** Panthers -- 16 pts
** Bills -- 14 pts
** Vikings -- 13 pts
** Lions -- 12 pts

Vick became the first QB ever to pass for three TDs and rush for two more in the first half of a game. His first two quarters bested all but six other teams in the league this weekend, and actually totaled more scoring than the entire output of the Bills' 14-12 win over the Lions.

Oh, he also outscored the rest of the Eagles, 36 to 23.

QB: Mike Vick, 57.37 pts -- sitting on my bench
RB: Keiland Williams, 34.23 pts -- sitting on the wire
WR: Dwayne Bowe, 37.40 pts -- started by Mike
TE: Rob Gronkowski, 27.80 pts -- started by Joel
K: Olindo Mare, 19.00 pts -- sitting on the wire
DEF: Indianapolis, 22.00 pts -- sitting on the wire
D: Dimitri Patterson, 13.50 pts -- sitting on the wire

OK, let's get this out of the way. This week, my starters collected 138 pts. And, mostly thanks to Vick, my backups totaled 142 pts. Played right, I could have topped 200 pts this week, but instead I left an incredible 70-plus pts on my bench. So, I bestow myself the Andy Reid Blown Call of the Week, ironically on the one week where he didn't blow a single call.

"All defenses" edition
3rd Place: Arizona, -2.00 pts -- started by Jeff
2nd Place: Washington, -5.00 pts -- sitting on Joel's bench
1st Place: Kansas City, -6.00 pts -- started by Jim

Kansas City posts the worst score possible on the week, recording no sacks or turnovers and allowing 49 points to the Broncos. Washington actually gave up 10 more points but recorded one sack, providing for their much better performance.

Sunday was a great day for Heisman Trophy winners -- 2008 recipient Sam Bradford and 2006 recipient Troy Smith battled into overtime of the Rams/49ers game, and 2007 winner Tim Tebow scored two TDs in Denver's big win over the Chiefs. How'd the other college greats do?

** Carson Palmer (2002 Heisman) -- threw 2 TDs but 3 INTs in the Bengals' loss to the Colts. In other words, he had a typical Heisman day.
** Matt Leinart (2004 Heisman) -- ably handled the clipboard as the third-string QB in the Texans loss to the Jaguars.
** Ricky Williams (1998 Heisman) -- lost a fumble in the Dolphins win over the Titans, but was not arrested for drug possession.
** Eric Crouch (2001 Heisman) -- offered commentary on the college football landscape on Versus, the Carolina Panthers of TV sports. Seriously.
** Reggie Bush (2005 Heisman) -- spent the Saints' bye week thinking about why he had to return his Heisman in shame.
** Ty Detmer (1990 Heisman) -- threw an interception to someone. Probably.

If you missed the Thursday night game on the NFL Network, consider yourself lucky. The broadcast featured the worst possible combination of commentators possible: Joe Theismann, who took one too many shots to the head during his playing career, and Matt Millen, who built the worst football team in NFL history (the 0-16 2007 Lions).

Here's just one example of how the conversation went all night long: After a flag was thrown in the third quarter while Atlanta was driving the ball down the field, both men chimed in:

Thiesmann: That flag is going to be an illegal lineman downfield. (Falcons QB) Matt Ryan held onto the ball too long, and that let his lineman get too far downfield.

Ref: Personal foul, defense (Ravens). Illegal hands to the face.

Millen: I think it's a personal foul on the Ravens.

Theismann: You might be right.

For the record, I think that was the only thing Millen got right all evening.

Actual votes you can make on the NFL's Pro Bowl voting site, with player stats provided as a courtesy by me:

NFC QB: Max Hall, Cardinals
YTD Stats -- 360 yds, 1 TD, 5 INTs, 41 QB rating

NFC RB: Reggie Bush, Saints
YTD Stats -- 18 rushing, 36 receiving yds, 0 TDs

AFC WR: Brian Robiskie, Browns
YTD Stats -- 9 catches, 81 receiving yards, 0 TDs

AFC TE: Brody Eldridge, Colts
YTD Stats -- 3 catches, 23 yards, 0 TDs

AFC Kicker: Ryan Lindell, Bills
YTD Stats -- 9 of 13 FGs, one missed XP

The Cowboys got their second win of the year on Sunday, embarrassing the Giants in New Jersey. Pundits credited the surprise performance to their new head coach, former offensive coordinator Jason Garrett. So, can he keep the momentum going? According to the letters in his name ... no.

New Dallas head coach Jason Garrett
** A cad, hotheads jeer. Wrong call, Satan. **

Not too many people know that Satan has hiring power within the Cowboys organization. Actually, he's mostly a figurehead within the company, but he does offer some personnel suggestions.

Click on the image below to make it bigger.

Another 160-plus-point week by Bobert pushes him further into the lead. Can he be stopped? Or is he the New Jersey Giants of our league, just waiting for a good punch in the nose?

Please, please do not confuse that analogy and punch Bob in the nose.

** Big week for me in the picks against Dad -- I swept all three we had different, giving me a one-game edge for the year thus far. That's what you call a comeback, folks. Still seven weeks of football left, though.

** FYI, the week after I said the Panthers wouldn't win a game this season, they won their first game of the year. Last week, I handicapped the Bills' uphill path to win a game this season, and on Sunday they won their first. I'm perfectly wrong with all my predictions. That's good enough to work for ESPN as an analyst.

** How good is NL Cy Young winner Roy Halladay? Well, he was the unanimous selection for the award, and the voting took place before the playoffs. So, everyone thought he deserved the award before pitching the second no-hitter in post-season history. That's good.