What ever happened to Pumpy Tudors?
A quick search through the entrails of the Internet shows that Clinton Tudors (nicknamed "pumpkin" and later "pumpy" by his jerk older brother because of his freakishly large head as a babe) was the greatest punter in the history of University of Tennessee-Chattanooga, and still holds the SEC record for career punting average at 44.4 yards per attempt.
Yet that impressive pedigree wasn't enough for the Eagles to keep Pumpy on their roster coming out of training camp 1992, when they opted to stick with a then-72-year-old punter named Jeff Feagles. Our little pumpkin tried again in 1993 to join the New England Patriots, but his Sequatchie Valley pedigree wasn't enough to impress the big city Foxboro scouts.
Dejected and burned out, he could have dropped out of public sight forever. But thanks to Stephen Hargis of the Chattanooga Times Free Press, we know the story has a happy ending.
He played football at every level from pee-wee to the pros. Despite all his athletic accomplishments, the uniform Pumpy Tudors dreamed of wearing more than any other had nothing to do with the NFL. It's the one he has worn the last 10 years as a Tennessee state trooper.
I know it doesn't make sense, but apparently Pumpy used his college degree after leaving college and became a productive member of society. If you're involved in a fatal accident on the freeways of Tennessee, you too could run into Pumpy (unless your on the losing end of that crash).
So, there's a lesson to be learned in all this: Some state troopers really could drop kick your ass across the country. That, and if you're a punter from a small school, you should really have a backup plan.
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