An appreciation of Jimmy Rollins

With trade winds starting to mention Jimmy Rollins' name, here's a quick overview of where the current Phillies shortstop sits in team history:

-- 2nd in games played (541 behind 1st place)
-- 2nd in doubles (4 behind 1st place)
-- 2nd in extra base hits (274 behind 1st place)
-- 3rd in stolen bases (1 behind 2nd place)
-- 3rd in runs (158 behind 2nd place)
-- 3rd in triples (21 behind 2nd place)
-- 4th in hits (120 behind 3rd place)
-- 9th in RBI (10 behind 8th place)
-- 10th in home runs (7 behind 9th place)

He's also second all-time in knee-jerk fan complaints, trailing only Ryan Howard.

Lincoln Financial Field renovations

Eagles officials announced $125 million in stadium renovations this week, designed to spruce up the team's home over the next two years. The headline projects include new video boards, a seating expansion and connecting bridges for the upper concourses. Here's what else to expect:

** New sideline signs indicating where the Eagles offense can find the end zone.
** A holding pen for Danny Watkins, to keep him from wandering onto the field.
** Cheese Whiz dispensers at every seat.
** Recycling bins for fans' unwanted Mike Vick jerseys.
** Decontamination/biohazard room for when the Cowboys visit.
** Wider doorways in media rooms, to accommodate Joe Buck's swollen head.
** A new mural dedicated to Koy Detmer's 1998 Eagles (3-13 record).
** In every restroom, a live audio feed of Donovan McNabb's current pissing and moaning.
** 40-foot tall bronze statue of Brian Dawkins sacking Troy Aikman.
** Hunter green everything.

Ongoing pain

This week marked the 30th anniversary of the 76ers 1983 championship, the most recent title for that storied franchise. It's a reminder that, despite the excitement of the 2008 Phillies World Series victory, Philadelphia fans have been in a ridiculously long title-less streak over the last three decades. Consider how the other major sports cities (those with all four sports) in America have fared since the end of the 1983 basketball season (117 professional sports seasons ago):

New York -- 10 titles
Boston -- 9 titles
Chicago -- 9 titles
Detroit -- 8 titles
San Francisco -- 7 titles
Dallas -- 5 titles
Miami -- 4 titles
Denver -- 3 titles
Minneapolis -- 2 titles
Washington -- 2 titles
Philadelphia -- 1 title
Phoenix -- 1 title 

Those cities in red? They didn't have all four sports teams for the whole 30 year span. In fact, Minneapolis, Washington and Phoenix have boasted all four for less than 15 years.

Let's get it in gear, folks. I can wait until my 60s for the next Philly champion.

Happy 36th birthday, G

As always, when G has a birthday, all the top Philly sports figures pay their respects.

Phillies logic puzzle

The Phillies hitting problem right now: 
Team avg -- .244 (21st in MLB)
Team runs -- 157 (27th in MLB)
Team RBI -- 147 (28th in MLB)

Related statistics:
Pinch hitter hits -- 20 (1st in MLB)
Pinch hitter avg -- .274 (5th in MLB)

The solution:
Bench Ryan Howard and Domonic Brown at the start of every game, then have them pinch hit at the bottom of the first inning. Since they'll be pinch hitters, their batting average will improve, and so will the team's performance.

Couldn't make the cut

Here's a look at a few key Phillies cast-offs from the last nine months, and how they're doing today:

Player: OF Nate Schierholtz
Status: Acquired by the Phils in the Hunter Pence trade, released in the off-season, signed by the Cubs
Stats: 107 AB, .299 AVG, 19 RBI, 4 HR
Analysis: That's a higher average than every Phillies starter except Michael Young, and more RBI than every player except Utley and Howard.


Player: 2B Yuniesky Betancourt
Status: Invited and dropped in Spring Training, signed by the Pirates
Stats: 125 AB, .248 AVG, 24 RBI, 8 HR
Analysis: That's a more HR than every Phillie on the roster, and more RBI than everyone but Utley (who also has 24).


Player: OF Hunter Pence
Status: Traded by the Phillies last August, under contract with the Giants through 2014
Stats: 153 AB, .281 AVG, 22 RBI, 7 HR, 7 SB
Analysis: It would have been expensive to keep him, but he'd be leading the team in HR and SB if he were here.


Player: P Joe Blanton
Status: Traded to the Dodgers last August
Stats: 8 starts, 0-7 record, 6.46 ERA
Analysis: OK, maybe they got that one right.

Playoff probability

The Flyers elimination from the playoffs last month made 2012-2013 the first sports year since 1992-1993 that none of the big four Philly teams made the postseason. Here’s a look at the upcoming teams’ outlook and when that streak might end.

2013 Phillies: Roy Halladay is hurt, the offense isn’t hitting, and the Braves look really good.
Chance: 5 percent

2013 Eagles: New coach, new attitude, same defensive players.
Chance: 4 percent

2013-14 Sixers: Andrew Bynum gets re-signed, then gets hurt again, then watches the losses pile up from the bench.
Chance: 5 percent

2013-14 Flyers: A slow start leads to a Bryzgalov trade, which leads to even more losses.
Chance: 7 percent

2014 Phillies: With Cliff Lee and Ryan Howard traded, Domonic Brown becomes the team’s leader. 105 losses follow.
Chance: 3 percent

2014 Eagles: QB Matt Barkley is named starter for the year. Gets benched by October.
Chance: 4 percent

2014-15 Sixers: Bynum gets traded for Dwight Howard, whose leadership skills shine through as expected.
Chance: 6 percent

2014-15 Flyers: No way the Flyers miss the playoffs three straight years. They aren’t the Columbus Blue Jackets.
Chance: 100 percent

Grading the Eagles draft grades

Here's a recap of how sports analysts broke down the Philadelphia Eagles' picks in this weekend's NFL, and how each of them performed.

** Mel Kiper, ESPN
His analysis: B-plus overall, A for value
Grade of his work: F
-- A multi-step grade is far too complicated. Can you fail in a chemistry test but get an A for effort? Sure, in a crappy charter school you can. But this is the big leagues, not New Jersey's suburbs.

** Eliot Harrison, NFL.com
His analysis: "overall winner"
Grade of his work: F
-- Again, this analysis misses the point of the grading system. Do we want a real perspective on which teams did well? Of course not. We want easy to digest grades. This isn't a pass/fail test. This is real fake grading.

** Evan Silva, Rotoworld
His analysis: C-minus
Grade of his work: F
-- His grading includes the phrase "All of Philly's rookies look like good values" and then he gives them the lowest grade in the NFC. Because that makes sense.

** Washington Post
Their analysis: B-plus
Grade of their work: F
-- Only one team got an A, and no team got worse than a C-. We want Ds and Fs. If everybody gets good grades, then clearly no one in the class has learned anything.

** Chris Burke, SI
His analysis: B
Grade of his work: B
-- Seems fair

** Rob Rang, CBS Sports
His analysis: A-minus
Grade of his work: F
-- Rang names only six of the Eagles eight draft picks in his 200-word analysis, omitting their fifth and final seventh round picks. Doesn't he know those marginal talents are the heart of draft grading? How can you decide if a team performed well without looking at the 239th player chosen?

Overall draft grading grade: D-minus

-- Too much repetition, too much effort making a simple, pointless letter into an actual grading exercise. I'd give the Eagles a B-plus for their draft. Wanna know why? None of your business, that's why. I'm the instructor, you can't question my authority. The end. Learn from my genius, folks. 

Eagles draft pick preview

With the draft just two days away, here's a look back at Eagles recent first round draft pick history:

2012: Defensive Lineman
2011: Offensive Lineman
2010: Defensive Lineman
2009: WR
2008: None
2007: None
2006: Defensive Lineman
2005: Defensive Lineman
2004: Offensive Lineman
2003: Defensive Lineman

Here's a look at their projected first-round pick this year:

CBS.com's Rob Rang: Defensive Lineman
CBS.com's Dane Brugler: Offensive Lineman
CBS.com's Pete Prisco: Defensive Lineman
NFL.com's Gil Brandt: Offensive Lineman
NFL.com's Josh Norris: Defensive Lineman
NFL.com's Matt Smith: Defensive Lineman
ESPN's Todd McShay: Offensive Lineman
Fox.com: Offensive Lineman

NFL draft fever -- catch it!

One man show

A quick look at the MLB RBI leaders so far, and just how much of their team's offense they account for:

I woulda though Utley was higher, since appears to be the only member of the Phillies who can hit.

Full data is here, if anyone should need it.

Bad pitching = good result

Number of game into the season it took the Phillies to give up 48 runs, by year:

2007 -- 9 games (later lost division playoffs)
2008 -- 9 games (later won World Series)
2009 -- 8 games (later lost World Series)
2010 -- 11 games (later lost NLCS)
2011 -- 14 games (later lost division playoffs)
2012 -- 17 games (missed playoffs)
2013 -- 7 games

Clearly, all this terrible pitching is great news -- the Phillies are on pace to win the World Series again.

The costs of baseball excellence

The Houston Astros (who won MLB's season opener last night) have an opening day payroll of $24.3 million, the lowest of any team and a little more than one-tenth what the Yankee's team costs right now ($229 million). A lot has been made that Alex Rodriguez alone ($29 million) will make more than the Astros' entire slate of players, but here's a look at what slice of the Phillies you could get for that little cash:

-- P Cliff Lee ($25M) for every start this year except one
-- P Roy Halladay ($20M) and P Kyle Kendrick ($4.5M)
-- SS Jimmy Rollins ($11M) and P Jonathan Papelbon ($13M)
-- Five C Carlos Ruizes ($5M)
-- Every outfielder on the roster (Laynce Nix at $1.35M, Delmon Young at $750K, John Mayberry at $517K, Ben Revere at $515K, Domonic Brown at $500K, Feddy Galvis at $490K) plus 1B Ryan Howard ($20M)
-- Fifty C Eric Kratzes ($496K)
-- One P Cole Hamels from 2013 ($19.5 M) and one P Cole Hamels from 2009 ($4.4M)
-- 1,435,294 baseballs from the Phillies official store ($17 each)

Recent Philly sports success

A brief look back at recent post-seasons:

** LaSalle's wins in the current NCAA tournament: 3

** Temple's wins in the current NCAA tournament: 1

** Other Philly sports playoff wins in the last 10 months, all pro and college spots: 0

** Other Philly sports teams to advance past the first round of the playoffs in the last 12 months, all pro and college sports: 2 (Flyers, Sixers)

** Other Philly sports teams to advance past the first round of the playoffs in the last 24 months, all pro and college sports: 3 (Flyers 2 times, Sixers)

So ... go Explorers.

Field of 64, Philly style

It's that time again. The last 12 months were awful for Philadelphia sports, but that doesn't mean we can't still find a clear winner. Or, at the very least, we can eliminate the 63 losers...

(Click the picture to view the full bracket already)

Goodbye and good riddance

In honor of the departure of overhyped and overpaid CB Nnamdi Asomugha, here's a look back at some of the highlights of his tenure with the Eagles: the anagrams of his name.

** Anguish and ammo
** I am human gonads
** Housing a madman
** A handgun mimosa
** Damn iguana mosh
** Ado, hamming anus
** No hugs, mama and I
** I can't cover anything.

OK, maybe that last one was a stretch...

Next season's sports-themed shows

Next week, ABC plans to debut its new show "Splash," which features athletes and c-list celebs learning how to dive off 10-meter platforms. The show's initial title, "The 8 p.m. bellyflop hour," was rejected in favor of the current one.

Still, the show is expected to be such as success that the networks have already ordered a slate of similar sporting-based shows for the fall schedule. Here's a preview:

Hopscotch (on FOX): Michael Irvin, Roger Clemens, John McEnroe and the cast of "The Real Housewives of Tulsa" pair up with professional playground enthusiasts to see which team can skip all the way to the top.

Clean sweep (on NBC): As a lead up to their 2014 Olympic programming, producers pit the world's top curling teams against Jeremy Roenick and his band of retired NHLers in a winner-take-all contest. But this time, checking is allowed.

Fish out of Water (on ABC): The New England Patriots linemen have what it take to protect Tom Brady, but can they save themselves in a game of Marco Polo against Joan Rivers?

Chutes and Losers (on CBS): Ever wonder how Betty White would do in a high-stress game of Chutes and Ladders? No? Too bad! This show pits her against unsuspecting New Yorkers, with a $500 prize on the line.

Tag (on TNT): Charles Barkley and some local schoolkids play tag. That's it. Series lasts 17 episodes.

Hole in the Wall (on Fox): Contestants stand at the end of a conveyor belt and have to angle their body in the shape of a hole in a wall to earn points. Oh, wait, that already happened.

Spring training facts

Extrapolating the likely Phillies season-end stats based on four spring training games:

RBI leader: 162, C Tommy Joseph
SB leader: 81, OF Ben Revere
Hits leader: 231, 2B Yuniesky Betancourt
Runs leader: 202, 1B Ryan Howard
HR leader: 81, OF Domonic Brown
** projected new MLB record

Wins leader: 54, RP Zach Miner

** projected new MLB record 

Ks leader: 235, SP Roy Halladay

BBs leader: 200, SP Tyler Cloyd

Losses leader: 54, RP Jonathan Papelbon

** projected new MLB record 

ERA leader: 0.00, SP Cliff Lee

** projected new MLB record 

Projected Phillies record: 41-81-40

I know 40 ties is unlikely, considering there haven't been any in baseball's regular season in about 100 years, but they do have that weird new interleague schedule, so ...

Phillies 2013 Spring Training ads

After the success of last year's early ad campaign, the Phillies are back with a new, grittier set of ads for the start of the 2013 season:

The State of Philadelphia Sports address, 2013

Mr. Speaker, Mr. Vice President, Members of Congress, fellow citizens:

Well, the Sixers lost yesterday, the Flyers lost yesterday, the Eagles resigned Mike Vick, and Chooch is suspended for the first 25 games of the baseball season.

Yeah, the state of our union is not good.

At least the state of the Philadelphia Union is still ok (0-0-1).

God bless America.

Greatest colleges ever

A full list of schools who can claim a U.S. vice president and a Super Bowl MVP among their alumni:

1 -- University of Michigan
VP: Gerald Ford
MVP: Tom Brady, Desmond Howard

2 -- University of Delaware
VP: Joe Biden
MVP: Joe Flacco

3 -- None

And, just to add to the prestige, see if you can identify which helmet is from which school: