After a restful bye week, here are a few modest predictions for how the Eagles’ second half will unfold:
** RB Saquon improved from 44 yds rushing two games ago against the Vikings to 150 yds rushing last game against the Giants. So a 106-yard improvement from each week here on out seems reasonable. That would mean 256 rushing yds against the Packers, 362 against the Lions, 468 against the Cowboys, and so on. That means he should end up with 5,535 yards on the ground by the end of the season, assuming he sits out game #17 again.
** DE Brandon Graham returns to the team just nine sacks behind DE Trent Cole for second on the Eagles all-time leader list. Given that there are only nine games left in the season, it will be difficult for Graham to get enough to move up. But with some fresh legs and luck, I’m predicting Graham gets just enough (48) to pass DE Reggie White for the franchise record. That’s just 5.5 a game, with a lighter load in game #17, obviously.
** QB Jalen Hurts has 60 rushing TDs for his career, third all time among passers in the regular season. Thanks to the tush push, Hurts has a chance to break that, before Thanksgiving. That would be five rushing TDs in each of the next three games, with a sixth in the contest against the Cowboys on Nov. 23. That seems extreme until you realize that Barkley will be getting tackled at the one-yard line between seven and 10 times a game in those matchups. Lots of opportunity.
** Given all of that firepower, there’s no reason to think that the Eagles will finish the season any worse than 15-1. True, they are 6-2 already, but after bulldozing teams in the second half, the NFL will be forced to reassess that first game against the Giants, and will opt to overturn the extra blemish on the schedule.
** Finally, despite all of their hard work and success, despite all the good feelings and All-Star play, and despite the opportunity for continued greatness, Philly fans will be disappointed in the playoffs as the Sixers will bomb out in the first round.
WR: Drake London, 30.37 pts — started by Jo
RB: Christian McCaffrey, 29.57 pts — started by Bob
TE: Brock Bowers, 33.07 pts — started by Joel
K: Ka'imi Fairbairn, 18.00 pts — started by Jonathan
DEF: Tennessee, 20.00 pts — on the wire
D: Cody Barton, 9.50 pts — on the wire
Caleb Williams has eight starts this year. Three times he has scored more than 25 fantasy points, including this week’s nearly 43 pts tally, the second highest individual score of the year. Three times he has scored fewer than 14 fantasy pts, including 16.48 in the last two weeks combined. So spare a thought to Jo, who two weeks ago had Bo Nix on her bench for a 43.96 pts performance, and cut Williams just before kickoff on Sunday. I agreed with both moves, because fantasy is cruel and dumb.
Nine QBs scored more than 30 fantasy pts this week, with both Jalen Hurts and Baker Mayfield on byes. Maybe football isn’t hard anymore?
Speaking of good offenses, Tennessee’s defense had fantasy 18 points in the previous seven weeks combined, so naturally they went for 20 on Sunday against a really good Chargers offense. That’s because fantasy is cruel and dumb.
“Players I have never heard of” edition3rd place: Adrian Martinez, -0.10 pts — on the wire
2nd place: Tahj Washington, -0.77 pts — on the wire
1st place: Roman Wilson, -1.23 pts — on the wire
Honestly, you could convince me pretty easily that all of those names were just computer-generated characters.
Panthers QB Bryce Young scored a whopping 2.98 fantasy pts on 102 yds passing and one INT Sunday … and still scored a win against the heavily-favored Packers. Bengals QB Joe Flacco scored 38.70 fantasy pts on 470 yds passing, two picks and four TDs … and lost. So apparently Flacco being 13 times better than Young wasn’t enough for the Bengals to win. Tough to be a Cincinnati fan right now.
** Headline in the Washington Post this week: “These QBs, pass rushers and others may or may not be traded this year.”
Really honing in on the news there. I do have an alternate headline suggestion: “Someone in the NFL will go somewhere sometime maybe.” Feels like that really gets at the heart of what they were trying to say.
** Great graphic by Fox during Game 7 of the World series showing the pain of Canadian sports fans. It was titled “Canada Dry” and showed no Canadian baseball team had won it all since 1993, no Canadian hockey team has won it all since 1993, and no Canadian basketball team has won it all since … the Toronto Raptors in 2019.
That’s the kind of long-term suffering that Boston fans talk about all the time.
** Before we get through another week of college football, we have to talk about the Buckeyes first-string running back: freshman Lamar Jackson.
Obviously, his parents didn’t know their son would be a football star, or that there would be another, more famous Lamar Jackson right as he got on the cusp of the pros. But he’s there now, so naturally he has decided to go by a nickname to limit confusion. Smart move.
He now goes by Bo instead.
That’s right. To avoid confusion with a famous NFL star, the kid decided to change his name … to the same one as a different, famous NFL star. Really outsmarted us all on that one. Solid work.
** Tennessee wins its final eight games and finishes 9-8.
** Jacksonville and Indianapolis both finish 8-7-2, with a tie against each other.
** Houston finishes 7-8-2, with ties against the Jags and Colts.
** New England and Buffalo both finish 8-8-1.
** Cincinnati wins five of its last eight to finish 8-9. Baltimore does the same.
** Pittsburgh loses seven of its last nine, to finish 7-10.
** San Diego and Denver finish 8-8-1.
** Kansas City ties four of its last eight and loses three more, finishing 6-7-4.
That makes the Bengals the AFC North winners, the Patriots the AFC East winners and the Chargers the AFC West winners. But, with a 9-8 record and the only winning record in the AFC, the Titans would be the #1 overall seed in the playoffs and get a first-round bye.
For real, though, you can figure it all out for yourself here. Dream big, folks. I’m looking forward to late January football in Nashville.
In a bizarre quirk of scheduling, the Cowboys played on Monday night this week and will play their next game (after a bye) on Monday night as well. Some may question why a middle-of-the-pack team like the Cowboys deserves such a prominent spot, but other NFL experts … would probably agree with that. Besides, it’s pretty clear from the TV guide description that the schedulers know how dumb the move is. Just look at what those letters rearranged clearly spell out: Dallas Cowboys starring on ESPN’s Monday Night Football
** Why? Bland slobs not good. Constant gas pain, misery for all
I bet you thought that indigestion was because of the chips you were eating. No! The Cowboys actually cause gastric distress. It’s a medical fact.
** Same as last week — split my picks with Dad, so I remain up five on him for the season. It feels like he’s laying in wait, looking for the right moment to strike. ** The Bengals lost 47-42 to the Bears this week and 39-38 to the Jets last week. They’re the first team to score 38+ points in consecutive weeks and lose since the 1966 Jets. And they’re the first team to lose two games in a season after scoring 38+ points since … the 2024 Bengals. Way to fix that defensive problem, guys.
** I’m always excited when the Cowboys trade for a player because it’s a new name for the anagram machine. Also, because they’re dumb and don’t know how to handle draft picks in trades.
Week 9 standings
Family Cup standings
House Doyle: 18-9
House Garrity: 14-13
House Quinn: 11-16
House Shane: 10-15-2
Big wins for Shelly and Mike keep them in first place. Jonathan, who is the top scorer in the league by a wide margin, is sitting down in fourth and in danger of missing the playoffs. And the league’s second highest-scoring team? That’s the team run by Emma and me, in dead last. Congrats to Shane for playing us this week and scoring his highest point total of the year, and the highest point total of the week. And congrats to Jimmy, who plays us next week, for inevitably scoring 140+ pts then.
Awesome Cup standings
1 — Saquontum Leap (Capt. Awesome), 1,140.22 pts
2 — Still The Best (Jonathan), 1,118.79 pts
3 — One Plus One is Three SBs (Pop), 1,099.13 pts
4 — Goederts and Monsterts (Bob), 1,075.98 pts
5 — City Hands (Mike), 1,041.32 pts
6 — Schwarbombs (Jo), 942.97 pts
7 — Vert der Ferks (Ant), 936.80 pts
8 — The Fightin Pickles (Sam), 934.55 pts
9 — DeVonta’s Inferno (Mom D), 917.04 pts
10 — Blue Collar Killers (Jeff), 903.48 pts
11 — The B Sharps (Paul), 830.86 pts
12 — All Rogers No Sauce (Joel), 694.23 pts
Jonathan picked up 0.32 pts on me this week, but the big moves were Dad and Bob both closing the gaps on the top two spots. Dad scored 155.41 pts, and Bob got 150.30 pts, both impressive leaps.
Mike rounds out the top tier of teams, but Jo is doing her best to climb into the upper echelon despite some terrible fantasy luck. Jeff has successfully made it into tier two, and could jump into sixth next week with a little luck. And it’s better not to discuss what’s happening behind him in the standings.
The NFL trade deadline passed this week, which means the league can send teams overseas again without worrying players will be stolen by European soccer squads, I guess. Broncos and Raiders on Thursday, Falcons and Colts early on Sunday in Berlin, and Eagles vs. Packers on Monday night. Adjust those rosters early.
