Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Fantasy football league is back up

The league has been renewed. If you're a returning coach, go sign up here today.

Tuesday, August 05, 2014

What to watch for in the Eagles first preseason game

This Friday, we'll get an answer to these burning questions:

1 -- How will Ifeanyi Momah perform?
Who's he? Momah was the #2 wideout for the Eagles in practice on Tuesday, after Jeremy Maclin rested his sore knee and Riley Cooper took the day off with a foot injury. The undrafted free agent probably won't be the long-term replacement for DeSean Jackson when the season starts, and Maclin expects to play on Friday. But, you never know with injuries...

2 -- Can Malclom Jenkins play both safety positions?
And maybe CB too? The Eagles ranked 32nd in the league against the pass last year, but Jenkins is the only new starter among the secondary. How much can he bring alone to fix the problem? Good news is they can't really do worse.

3 -- Will Matt Barkley win the #2 QB job over Mark Sanchez?
Follow up question: If either one has to start a game this season, will the Eagles score negative points?

4 -- Is Trent Cole still on this team?
The answer is yes, but isn't that surprising? Wasn't he drafted in the 1970s?

5 -- How will Chip Kelly shock the league this year?
Last season, the rookie coach had the fifth-highest scoring offense and the top rushing attack in all of football. This season? The defense needs fixing and the offense needs sustaining. And I'm sure he'll show all his cards in the first preseason game. That's when you want to show off the new razzle dazzle.

Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Looking ahead

As of today, the Phillies are 47-61. Here's a look at what the rest of the season could bring:

If they go 0-54:
--- Final record: 47-115

If they go 23-31:
-- Final record: 70-92

If they go 27-27:
--- Final record: 74-88

If they go 34-20:
--- Final record: 81-81

If they go 43-11:
--- Final record: 90-72

If they go 54-0:
--- Final record: 101-61



Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Rejected 2014 Eagles-themed fantasy football team names


-- Flying the Cooper
-- Foles rush in
-- Missing-in-action Jackson
-- Chipping away
-- So bad it Ertz
-- Barkley up the wrong tree
-- Bros before Sproles
-- Big Maclin
-- Mark Sanchez sucks

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

Phillies all-time All-Star roster


1B -- Pete Rose (4 appearances)
2B -- Chase Utley (6 appearances)
SS -- Larry Bowa (5 appearances)
3B -- Mike Schmidt (12 appearances)
RF -- Johnny Callison (3 appearances)
CF -- Richie Ashburn (4 appearances)
LF -- Greg Luzinski (4 appearances)
SP -- Steve Carlton (7 appearances)
RP -- Robin Roberts (5 appearances)

I know putting Roberts as a relief pitcher is cheating, but no Phillies closer has ever had more than one All Star appearance. Besides, given the choice between Tom Gordon and Robin Roberts for the ninth, who are you sending out to the mound?

Tuesday, July 08, 2014

Futility perspective


Times the Phils have scored five runs in a game over the last two weeks:
--- 2

Times the German soccer team has scored five goals in a game over the last two weeks:
--- 1

I'd give the Phils a 50/50 chance to beat the German futeballers in a 9-inning match.

Tuesday, July 01, 2014

Soccer's wet blanket

I get that the World Cup is only a snapshot of each team's accomplishments, and that the tournament only comes every four years. But to win over casual skeptics, you do have to consider the following facts:

-- This year, the US played in 4 World Cup games. They won 1.
-- In the last 10 years, the US has played in 9 World Cup games. They've won 2.
-- In the last 20 years, the US has played in 23 World Cup games. They've won 5.

Eight teams have three or more wins this year alone.

I'm not saying the team is regressing, or that it wasn't fun. I'm just saying it's a lot to ask for casual fans to wait another Olympic-long break for the possibility of one more win.

Tuesday, June 24, 2014

ESPN search engine optimized headlines for June

-- LeBron James' next stop: The Yankees?
-- Tim Tebow on the U.S. soccer team
-- Carmelo Anthony: 'I want to be the Brett Favre of New York'
-- Would two LeBrons beat Michael Jordan ... and LeBron?
-- Steven A. Smith breaks down latest NBA analysis by Steven A. Smith
-- NFL NFL NFL NFL

Monday, June 16, 2014

There's always a chance (except in the NBA)

Different franchises to win a championship, by sport:

NFL
Last 10 years: 8
Last 20 years: 13
Last 30 years: 15

MLB
Last 10 years: 6
Last 20 years: 9
Last 30 years: 17

NHL
Last 10 years: 7
Last 20 years: 11
Last 30 years: 15

NBA
Last 10 years: 5
Last 20 years: 8
Last 30 years: 8

So, in the last three decades, roughly half of the franchises in baseball, football and hockey have won a championship. Only a quarter of the franchises in basketball have.

But next year is a new season! Anyone has a chance to win it all (provided you’re in Miami, LA or Texas).

Tuesday, June 10, 2014

Silver lining

NL All-Star voting as of 6/9:

It's a terrible baseball season, but at least one thing is right in the world. 

Tuesday, June 03, 2014

Spinning the Phillies record positive

Entering Tuesday's game, from the "hope springs eternal" files:

Phils record vs NL only: 23-23
Phils record on the road: 12-12
Phils record in games south of Philly: 11-11
Phils record in extra innings: 4-4
Phils record in 1-run games: 11-10
Phils record in day games: 10-8
Phils record on the weekend: 11-7

If you just look at those numbers, the team doesn't look so bad. 

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Fixing Natitude

The Washington Nationals dropped below .500 again this week, so I thought I'd help their promotions department by updating their print ads:



 

    

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Alternatives to the current NBA draft


-- Three-on-three tournament for the lottery teams, in lieu of the NBA playoffs. Winner gets the top pick. That'll keep teams from tanking.

-- Team CEO battle royale. Last one out of the ring gets the prize.

-- Announce that Cleveland gets the #1 pick, no matter what. After all, they've gotten it three times in the last four years and another one in 2003.

-- Just, you know, give the worst teams the top pick, like everybody else.

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Evaluating the Eagles 2014 draft, anagrams-style

Round 1: OLB Marcus Smith
Top anagram: I am sloth crumbs
Verdict: Questionable 

Round 2: WR Jordan Matthews
Top anagram: Drawn smart, jet how!
Verdict: Promising

Round 3: Wideout Josh Huff
Top anagram: I just fed woof, huh?
Verdict: Troubling

Round 4: CB Jaylen Watkins
Top anagram: Twinkly cab jeans
Verdict: Disturbing

Round 5a: DE Taylor Hart
Top anagram: A ratty holder
Verdict: Terrible

Round 5b: S Ed Reynolds
Top anagram: Sleds nerd, yo
Verdict: Weird

Round 7: DT Beau Allen
Top anagram: A belled tuna
Verdict: Adorable

Tuesday, May 06, 2014

The only sensible Eagles draft pick

With the NFL draft set to kick off Thursday, most of the so-called experts have Chip Kelly's Eagles taking a wideout or a defensive back in the first round. That would be a waste.

Sure, with the departure of DeSean Jackson, they need speed and size on offense. But a one-dimensional wide receiver or cornerback only helps half of the time. What would spur the team would be a perfect blend of both, a two-way player who can both score points and supply a stifling defense.

The right choice with the 22nd pick is to take Michael Carter-Williams.

Pros:
-- Led the NBA in points, rebounds and assists among rookies
-- At 6-6, provides a tall end zone target
-- Already familiar with Philadelphia
-- A natural "point guard" on the field
-- Not discouraged by losing or adversity
-- Will be available in the late first round

Cons:
-- Doesn't play football (Kelly's offense can fix that)
-- At 185, he'll need to put on some weight
-- As a non QB or kicker, likely can't wear #1
-- Did have recent shoulder surgery
-- Has prior commitments during some late fall weeks

Forget the scouting reports -- he's clearly the right fit for the birds. If they decide to take another route, there's still a chance he'll be available in round two, but I wouldn't let him slip below that.

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Flyers in game 7s


Year  Opponent  Round  Home? Result  
2011Buffalofirsthomewin
2010Bruinssecondawaywin
2008Capitalsfirstawaywin
2004Lightningthirdawayloss
2003Leafsfirsthomewin
2000Devilsthirdhomeloss
1989Penguinssecondawaywin
1988Capitalsfirstawayloss
1987Islanderssecondhomewin
1987Oilersfinalsawayloss
1981Flamessecondhomeloss
1976Leafsfirsthomewin
1975Islanderssecondhomewin
1974Rangerssecondhomewin
1968Bluesfirsthomeloss

Overall record: 9-6
Away record: 3-2
Round 1 record: 4-2
Vs. NY record: 3-0
With Claude Giroux record: 3-0



Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Better NFL PR than NFL's PR shop

A mid-April NFL quiz for you: Identify which sentences below came from a serious news story by ESPN on the NFL's upcoming schedule release, and which came from a press release promoting the league from NFL headquarters:

"Annually, the release of the NFL schedule has become almost like a national holiday."
-- Answer

"Throughout the (schedule release) show, fans can interact with the analysts and voice their opinions on the 2014 NFL schedule by posing questions via Twitter and Facebook."
-- Answer

"Starting Wednesday, teams can start printing out schedules and fans can start making their plans for the 2014 season."
-- Answer

"A three-hour special hosted by Rich Eisen and featuring analysts Steve Mariucci, Warren Sapp, and Mike Silver breaks down the entire 2014 regular season schedule, division by division, analyzing the top matchups and primetime games"
-- Answer

"Within the next year, NFL owners are expected to vote on the addition of one more playoff team per conference, allowing each conference to have seven playoff teams."
-- Answer

"Finally! NFL will release 2014 schedule on Wednesday night"
-- Answer

OK, that last one was a trick. I guess ESPN isn't the only news org totally in the bag for the league.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Tax day for Philly players

Here's a look at all of Philadelphia's current athletic millionaires -- 65 baseball, football, basketball and hockey players currently make more than $1 million. Combined, they'll collect more than $341 million this year.

That means that through the Philadelphia wage tax -- which sits at just under 3.5% for non-residents -- this group will bring in almost $12 million in tax revenue for the city. Which means Philly will have enough money to hire LeSean McCoy ($9.7 million salary) and Michael Carter-Williams ($2.2 million salary) to pick up trash around City Hall, if they want.

Other interesting observations:

-- The top seven highest paid Philly athletes are all Phillies.
-- Kyle Kendrick gets paid twice what Claude Giroux does.
-- Only one current Sixer and one current Flyer crack the top 20.
-- Jonathan Papelbon stinks.

Tuesday, April 08, 2014

Phillies home openers, by the numbers

All stats before today's opening day loss.

** W/L in home openers in the last 30 years: 10-20

** Longest home opener winning streak: 2 games (once)
** Longest home opener losing streak: 4 games (twice)

** 10+ runs scored on home opener: 1
** 10+ runs allowed on home opener : 5

** Average home opener margin of defeat: 4.0 runs
** Average home opener margin of victory: 2.8 runs

** Home opener losses that lead to losing seasons: 11
** Home opener losses that lead to winning seasons: 9

** Home opener wins that lead to losing seasons: 6
** Home opener wins that lead to winning seasons: 4

** Home opener losses that lead to World Series appearances: 3
** Home opener wins that lead to World Series appearances: 0

So, ignoring everything but that last stat, be excited that the Phils got killed today. 

Tuesday, April 01, 2014

Meet the new Phillies

There are a handful of new faces on the Phils this year, so what better way is there to meet them than through anagrams?

Third baseman Cody Asche
-- Hired batsman, cash decoy

Catcher Wil Nieves
-- Relieve, can switch

Relief Pitcher Mario Hollands
-- Harpoon arm, chilliest fielder

Starter AJ Burnett
-- Better stat jar run

Pitcher Jeff Manship
-- no anagram needed