Fantasy league 2019 -- week 4 recap

 

Eleven months ago, Phillies owner John Middleton said that he was going into the offseason “expecting to spend money, and maybe even be stupid about it.” Here’s how that played out:

** Spent $30 million on the 59th ranked player in baseball (OF Bryce Harper).

** Spent $10 million on another OF who played about one-third of the season (Andrew McCutchen).

** Spent $5.4 million on another OF who played about one-quarter of the season (Odubel Herrera).

** Spent $25 million on a SP who went 8-8 with a 4.64 ERA (Jake Arrieta).

** Spent $10 million on a RP who threw fewer than seven innings on the year (David Robertson).

** Spent $9 million on another RP who threw fewer than six innings on the year (Tommy Hunter).

** Spent $7.8 million on another RP who threw only 18 innings this year (Pat Neshek).

** Spent $9.2 million on another RP who posted a 4.75 ERA (Juan Nicasio).

** Spent $1 million on a manager who has no clear ability to manage (Gabe Kapler).

Stupid indeed. Congrats on that 4th place finish in the division with a payroll $20 million above the first place team.

 

QB: Jameis Winston, 37.30 pts — on the wire
WR: Chris Godwin, 29.47 pts — started by Joel
RB: Nick Chubb, 30.48 pts — started by Jeff
TE: Austin Hooper, 13.67 pts — started by Jeff
K: Matt Prater, 15.00 pts — started by Jeff
DEF: New Jersey Giants, 27.00 pts — on the wire
D: Erik Harris, 11.50 pts — on the wire

Good showing by Jeff, but two of those categories are pretty low scoring. He could have traded in the TE and K for the DEF and only lost 1 point.

If you had the Bucs breaking out against the Rams this week, I would like to sign up for your investment newsletter. Tampa Bay scored 55 pts against what was a decent Rams defense coming into this week, and Winston (who is terrible) posted a 120.5 QB rating with four TDs, 385 yds passing and only one interception. Combined with the Cowboys loss and the Eagles stunning win over the Packers on Thursday night, I have come to the conclusion that no one is any good in the NFC.


“More bad defense” edition

2nd place: Miami, -2.00 pts — on the wire
1st place (tie): Green Bay, -3.00 pts — started by Joel
1st place (tie): Baltimore, -3.00 pts — started by Jo

Things could have been even worse for the Ravens, who had an interception and a sack to recover a few fantasy pts after allowing 40 on the scoreboard to the Browns. And Green Bay looked solid for a lot of the first half of the game against the Eagles, but never managed a turnover or a sack.

But the most exciting story here are the Dolphins, whose defense has now totaled -6.00 pts through four weeks of play. That’s really, really tough to do. So far Miami has scored 26 pts on the year but given up 163 through four games. A minus-137 points differential projects out to being outscored on the season by 78 touchdowns (and a field goal). And somehow, they’re tied with four other teams for the worst record in the league, because there is so much bad out there right now.

** After Sunday’s sloppy, come-from-behind victory over the Lions, Chiefs Coach Andy Reid celebrated with his team in the locker room by yelling out “Not all of Mozart’s paintings were perfect!”

Although, I guess we shouldn’t be surprised that Reid can’t tell the difference between music and paintings when we know he can’t tell the difference between a two-minute drill and a 10-minute one.

** Here is an excerpt from the review from masslive.com of the new Stuffed Cheeze-It Pizza, which debuted at Pizza Hut last week and was heavily advertised throughout games this weekend:

It really takes some guts for the company to claim this is “pizza” when it only has one of the key ingredients. There’s no pizza dough and the sauce comes in a separate container. No, it’s more like a cross between a flat mozzarella stick and a memory foam throw pillow. Unfortunately for those who were flimflammed into spending $7.49 for four of these, the pale white contents taste more like the pillow.

In summary, we are doomed as a society.

** Headline: Referee Shot In The Head By Cannon During College Football Game

In summary, we are doomed as a society.

The New Jersey Jets travel to Philadelphia this week to take on the Eagles in the second match-up of the teams this season. The first was a disheartening loss for the Philadelphia squad to finish up the pre-season. What can the team learn from that 6-0 embarrassing defeat?

** Don’t let Wendell Smallwood be your leading rusher — He carried the ball seven times in that game for 23 yds. He’s no longer with the Eagles, butt his caochin staff should be reminded to use their actual #1 back (Jordan Howard) more often than they do.

** QB Luke Falk is beatable — The Jets third-string pass caller actually played in the pre-season finale posting 91 yds on 18 attempts against mostly fifth-string defenders. Because of injuries, he was elevated to the #1 QB in the Jets last game. So if the Eagles first-string defense can’t handle him…

** Don’t let Clayton Thorson in the game — As the Eagles only QB that night, Thorson passed for 84 yds and an interception without leading a single scoring drive. He was cut by the team a few days later and is a member of the Cowboys now, so all the more reason to keep him away from the field.

** There is a Jets player named Trenton Cannon — He’s a running back. How a team from New Jersey can let a man named Trenton Cannon play RB instead of QB is beyond me. This just illustrates how poorly that squad is coached.

** Score some points — In general, it’s difficult to win games where you are shut out. This time, they should try instead of just rolling over and playing dead.


The Cowboys spent a second-round pick on a safety this spring in an effort to shore up their secondary. So far, Donovan Wilson has lived up to expectations, performing well in limited duty. But does he really fit with the Dallas culture? Just shift a few letters around and you can see he clearly does…

Rookie Safety Donovan Wilson
** A void, a fool. Knows no serenity.

FYI, that is the first use of the word “serenity” in 13 years of this blog. You’re welcome.

** Lost again, down seven to Dad now. I’m not going to win a single week this year, am I?

** Delaware (FCS, old Division I-AA) came thiiiiiis close to beating Pittsburgh (FBS, old Division I-A) on Saturday and if they had this entire blog probably would have been just Blue Hen highlights.

** I like the Packers getting 10 days rest angry and losing a close game to an NFC East team getting to match-up against a reeling NFC East Cowboys squad this week...

Week 4 standings

1 — McCown or Never (Capt. Awesome), 519.80 pts
2 — For Who? For Wentz? (Ant), 509.99 pts
3 — Blue Collar Killers (Jeff), 498.59 pts
4 — Peabody and Sherman (Dad), 477.56 pts
5 — SweatpantsEnthusiast (Mike), 467.94 pts
6 — Philly Special (Jo), 455.05 pts
7 — We Love the Mud (Mom D), 433.59 pts
8 — Last Exit 2 Kutztown (Bob), 431.93 pts
9 — Kneel Armstrong (Sam), 427.52 pts
10 — SoccerSeasonOrphans (Paul), 408.97 pts
11 — Ezekiel34 holdout (Joel), 405.19 pts
12 — I love the Cowboys (Joey McDeadAccount), 4.13 pts

Joey is finally on the board! WR Marvin Hall, a free agent without a team when I assigned dead players to this team at the start of the season, was signed to Detroit Lions practice squad a few weeks ago and made the active roster just before the game against the Eagles. On Sunday, he had two catches for 47 yds, giving our squad of loser fantasy players its first points of the year.
Obviously this is a bitter disappointment to me, since I liked seeing zeroes next to “I love the Cowboys” each week.

But, in the interest of statistical experimentation, I’m going to leave Joey’s roster as is and see just how many pts it can accumulate. If Hall turns into an actual fantasy asset (unlikely, but then again I thought he wouldn’t record a catch this year) then I may need to re-evaluate.

In more important news, a strong week by the Josh McCown fan club vaulted me back above Ant and into first place. With Jeff just a few points behind him, we’re starting to create an upper tier of medalists above the rest of you wanna-be Olympians. Dad will insist he is close too, but he is not. It's OK, he never reads the weekly updates.

Our 5-6-7 run has been renamed “Doyle corner” to reflect the family members all group together there, and Paul and Joel are in a tight match to see who can field the worst group of players short of good old Joey’s squad.

Thursday match-up this week is Rams and Seahawks, which would be awesome to watch if it weren’t tired teams fighting it out on a work night. Get your rosters ready anyways.