Fantasy league 2017 -- week 16 recap

 

Twas the day after Christmas
And all through Eagle land
Lots of fans were a-stressing
With the playoffs at hand.
The teams first-round bye
Was safe and secure
While the Giants whole season
Resembled manure.
The Cowboys post-season hopes
Had dwindled to a blur
As had their southern rival’s
Whose name is a slur.
With their foes all vanquished
Left asleep in their beds
The team enjoyed visions
Of February in their heads.
When out on the field
There arose such a clatter
I sprang when the TV
Showed Nick’s play all in tatters.
Could the playoffs be worthwhile
In the hands of a Foles?
Did his years in football exile
Leave him with weak throws?
We won’t know the answer
Til several weeks more
And yet, at least this season
Wasn’t a bore.
Football was fun again
For at least a few months.
We saw far more touchdowns
Than fourth-and-one punts.
So this Christmas, be merry
For in many seasons hence
There will be more football.
There will be more Wentz.

QB: Jared Goff, 33.44 pts — started by Jim
WR: Larry Fitzgerald, 19.27 pts — started by Mom D
RB: Todd Gurley, 39.33 pts — started by Mike
TE: Antonio Gates, 14.40 pts — started by Jim
K: Harrison Butker, 18.00 pts — started by Dad
DEF: Arizona, 29.00 pts — on the wire
D: Mike Hilton, 11.00 pts — on the wire

Still lots of talk about Tom Brady as MVP (which is still stupid) but Gurley is dropping a really convincing case why he's probably the best player in football this year. He's first in the league in rushing yds (1305) and rushing TDs (13) and first among RBs in receiving yds (788) and receiving TDs (6). If he scores once next week he'll finish the season with 20 combined TDs and 2,000 combined yds. And a division title for a team that finished in last place last year.

That's not bad. Better than Brady for sure.


“Players we started” edition

3rd place: Bronson Hill, -0.20 pts — on the wire
2nd place: Houston, -1.00 pts — on Bob’s bench
1st place: Elijah McGuire, -1.50 pts — on the wire

Not listed at the very bottom: Dak Prescott, the 30th ranked QB on the week, and Eli Manning, the 31st ranked QB. Combined, they scored 0.10 pts less in fantasy pts than Nick Foles (10.52 pts). But, yeah, they're both great QBs still.


** After a painful offensive night on Monday with the Eagles, I awoke to WIP on Tuesday morning complaining about … the defense giving up too many rushing yards. “You think we’re going to be able to stop New Orleans’ two backs in January if they’re giving up those big runs?”

Just to recap the game again: The Eagles just barely had 200 yards of offense while the defense recorded five turnovers and a TD. This is not the time to stress about the defense.

** This week’s stupid Washington Post headline: “Nationals can make a big move by standing pat.”

No. They can’t. Those are opposites. That’s not how opposites work. If they don’t move it’s not a big move. No.

** I know you think there wasn’t a Thursday Night Football game this week, but you’re wrong. It was just two days later, when it was a special Saturday night edition of Thursday Night Football. Obviously.

It’s possible that part of Monday night’s disappointing performance by Nick Foles was a result of the undo pressure on him — everywhere you looked in the stadium, there was another “St. Nick” sign asking him to deliver a Super Bowl. For future reference, if we’re demanding holiday cheer from the Eagles, we should spread the pressure around to a wider group of players. Here are a few nicknames to consider:

— Chris “Kringle” Long
— Mack “Holly” Hollins
— Lane “Jolly” Johnson
— Mal-”Come all ye faithful” Jenkins
— Nel-”Son of God” Agholor
— Zach “Full of toys” Ertz
— Doug “Please stop trying to ruin Christmas” Pederson

Dallas was eliminated from the playoffs on Sunday after a lackluster, no TDs effort against the Seahawks. You would think that would be reason enough to relax and celebrate, but a lack of vigilance is what lets the darkness that is the Cowboys being seep back in. Consider what their reserves are plotting now:

Cowboys reserve Defensive Tackle Stephen Paea
** No peace on Earth: fever-stacked byes, evil sweeps

At Christmas even. I know the game doesn’t matter, but I want the Eagles to win by 70 next week.

** Backsliding for Dad this week: I went 3-2 against him, leaving him down seven games heading into the final week of the season. But he deserves extra credit for picking the Seahawks over the Cowboys, making for a glorious Christmas Eve gift.Even with the extra credit, though, he's down seven.

** There's a great chance that we’re going to have only the second 0-16 team in NFL history next week, and even I feel bad joking about it. Well, for this week at least.

** The big college football bowl games are coming this week, so don't forget to try and pretend to care.

Week 16 standings

1 — Foles me Wentz (Capt. Awesome), 2016.33 pts
2 — For Who? For Wentz? (Ant), 1819.37 pts
3 — Gronky Tonk Man (Joel), 1808.22 pts
4 — Animal Crackers (Mom D), 1797.19 pts
5 — Dat CTE Lyfe (Sam), 1764.59 pts
6 — ThePigskin Predators (Dad), 1740.33 pts
7 — Cosby's Sleepers (Mike), 1706.19 pts
8 — Foles v. Sproles ( Jo), 1663.50 pts
9 — Tiny Trump Gloves (Jim), 1542.73 pts
10 — Blue Collar Killers (Jeff), 1457.55 pts
11 — SmartyPants on Fire (Paul), 1420.80 pts
12 — Last Exit 2 Kutztown (Bob), 1391.49 pts

Anthony closed the gap between first and second this week … to a mere 197 pts. We have had teams score 200 pts in a week before, so this season isn't over yet. But, in a more realistic sense, it is.

Am I taking this for granted? Of course not. You never let up until the game is won. True leaders know that. And because I want to make sure I secure a worthy victory, I'll be setting my roster based on those needed leadership skills. That's why I will be starting Carson Wentz at QB. I can't think of a better captain to lead my team to the glory of another Awesome Cup title.

All the NFL games this week are set for Sunday, so you've got no excuse for forgetting to set your roster. Let's finish the season strong.