Fantasy football recap, Pro Bowl week

-- Top performers, Pro Bowl edition
QB: Carson Palmer, 20.60 points – sitting on the waiver wire
RB: LaDanian Tomlinson, 11.10 points – sitting on the waiver wire
WR: Reggie Wayne, 19.60 points – sitting on the waiver wire
TE: Alge Crumpler, 7.00 points – sitting on the wavier wire
K: Nate Keading, 7.00 points – sitting on the wavier wire
DEF: AFC, 19.00 points – sitting on the waiver wire
        Of course, you’d have to be sick to care about the fantasy stats of Pro-Bowl players.
        You’d have to be even sicker if Tony Romo’s interception and Tiki Barber’s cavalier rushing cost you the freaking All-Star fantasy game championship. I’m just saying.

-- Stupidest thing I heard this week
        Football season is officially over, and Sean Salisbury is already working on ruining next season.
Exhibit #1 -- Predicting the Raiders record in 2007: “I see them as a sub-par .500 team. I can’t see them winning more than four games.”
        Then why did you just say they’d be a .500 team, even if they’re sub-par?
Exhibit #2 -- Grading the Lions 2006 season: “This is easy to assign a grade to. I’d give them a C-minus or worse.”
        If it’s so easy, why can’t you just pick a grade?
Exhibit #3 -- On Marty Schottenheimer’s firing: “It is a surprise, but it’s one that a lot of people saw coming.”
        Please, dear gawd, stop the pain

-- Best names in the upcoming draft
*** Tony Ugoh, Arkansas OT – I can’t decide if it’s pronounced “Yugo” or “Ugh”
*** Tony Gonzalez, Ohio State WR – He goes by Anthony, but c’mon: He’s a big guy who catches passes. Of course he’s Tony Gonzalez.
*** Tim Crowder, Texas DE – You gotta like a pass rusher whose name is crowder.
*** Tom Zbikowski, Notre Dame S – Good luck pronouncing that on day two.

-- Funniest thing I read this week
        “It’s hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning.” -- Bill Watterson

-- Cowboys anagram insult of the week
        I just couldn’t wait until next season.
        How will “New Head Coach Wade Phillips” do when he takes over the Cowboys next season? Let’s have a look:
*** Sad dope will ache, chap, whine
        Sounds like he’s already in that mid-season Dallas form to me.